RUAROK

Today is the service to say goodbye to the king and queen, and I am in torment.

Whispers are echoing all down the corridors, in the kitchens, through the courtyard and stables.

No one is mentioning me, of course. That I like to fuck is of no surprise to anyone. The princess, however…now, that is a scandal. I’ve changed the way people look at her.

The sky is gray and low, and a cold wind whips around us. The clouds skitter around the tallest parts of the castle, swallowing the flags that snap in the air. It’s as though the weather understands the mood of those gathered here today and is doing its best to mirror it.

The service is taking place at the edge of the pit where the King’s Tower once stood. A platform has been erected, which I’m now stood upon, together with the cleric, and several other prominent members of the king’s court.

Princess Taelyn stands on the opposite side, doing her best not to make eye contact with me.

She’s been avoiding me, too, and that is worse than anything.

Does she know I left the door open deliberately?

That I made her say words I knew would shock anyone who overheard them?

I did my best to make her appear as un-queen-like as possible, and it worked.

I’ve betrayed her trust.

And I feel sick at myself.

By the gods, she looks beautiful, though. Her long, silvery-white hair is braided and knotted on top of her head. Her pale complexion is striking against the black of her dress.

Everyone has dressed in black. Citizens of Askos have gathered as far as the eye can see, a winding trail of them leading from the castle, down into the city. They won’t be able to hear every word spoken, but they will pass it from person to person.

I try to focus on the prize. All I needed was to create doubt in the minds of the people of Askos as to who they should want their ruler to be.

Cirrus is doing the rest, making sure his little mice scratch around in all the right places.

Soon, the people of Askos will demand that I take the throne, and I will get what I’ve wanted all along.

I keep telling myself that. The throne is what is important. Women come and go. The throne is forever.

So why do I feel so wretched?

Is it because she means more to me than any woman I’ve ever met?

Feelings aren’t something I’m used to. For the most part, all I’ve ever felt is anger and lust, but this is something different. I’m worried about her, and not just because of the effect that might have on me. I actually care about her.

I might even love her .

I close my eyes and scrub my hand over my face. No, I can’t let this happen. All I’ve ever wanted was to sit in my father’s seat. How can that happen if I’ve stolen it from Taelyn?

Or was she the one to steal it from me in the first place?

This whole thing is so fucking confusing.

The only thing I’m not confused about is wanting her.

By the gods, she’d tasted incredible and now I want the main course.

I wish I hadn’t been so rough with her, but I’d lost control.

I’m half Incubus and I’ve spent the last ten years locked up alone without being able to even touch myself.

Is it any wonder the first time I’m with a woman, I forget myself?

Perhaps I should have found a couple of whores to fuck before I’d gone anywhere near Taelyn so I’d have been able to control myself, but I simply hadn’t wanted anyone but her.

Now I may never have her.

The cleric stands and goes to the front of the platform. A hush descends on the crowd.

Cirrus has tried to convince me to say a few words, but how can I?

I have nothing good to say about the king, and I didn’t even know the queen, except for in a few passing moments ten years ago.

He’s concerned that allowing Taelyn to speak alone will not look good for me and will put her in a better light with the people, but I can’t bring myself to do it.

The cleric begins to speak.

I only catch parts of what he says, but it’s enough for me to get the gist of it. “Beloved king and queen…Lost before their time…Leave behind the queen’s daughter, Prin cess Taelyn, and the king’s son, Prince Ruarok. Much missed…National mourning…”

And then he finishes and steps down

Taelyn stands and takes his place. “I understand it is a lot to ask for us to expect you to mourn your king and queen, when so many of you are mourning the loss of loved ones as well. You have lost your homes, and your way of life is threatened.” She places her hand to her chest, right above her heart.

“I understand fully what you’re going through because I’ve been in exactly the same place myself.

If it were not for the kindness of the king, my mother, the queen, and I would have died ten years ago when our homeland was taken by the rot. ”

The mention of the kindness of the king makes me want to snarl with fury. It had nothing to do with kindness. He’d wanted to bed a beautiful woman and have a full-blooded Fae princess to take the place of his bastard son.

Now is not the time to give voice to my thoughts, no matter how much I might want to.

There are no bodies to be lowered into the ground. Instead, a flock of white doves are released into the air, symbolizing the release of their spirits.

Their wings beat the air in a flurry of movement. A couple of white feathers are caught in the wind and whisked away. I stand with my neck craned upward, watching the birds move seemingly as one, flying in a circle and then into the distance.

One thought lingers in my mind.

Good riddance.