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“Good for work.” Something about the word work felt like a sucker punch. He didn’t mean anything by it. Of course he was talking about work. We both were. It was a work trip. And yet, it felt like a good-bye—one I wasn’t ready for.

“I was interested in possibly reaching out about the beta testing they’re doing on the new app for employee phones.” And just like that, our lunch pivoted into a full-on business meeting.

Exactly as it should be.

His brother called in the middle of it—again. That seemed to be Booker’s new favorite thing to do… pestering his brother. I’d worked with Garner enough to know this wasn’t how it normally was, and I couldn’t help but wonder why he was being like this. Itwas weird, because each time Garner answered, he sounded less and less impressed. I didn’t know if that was just sibling stuff or if there was something beyond that.

Not that I was going to ask. I couldn’t even ask him if he wanted to date me. I probably shouldn’t be poking around in family business either.

The drive home was filled with a lively and far-too-thorough discussion of the pros and cons about the beta-testing offer. Ultimately, we decided it probably wasn’t for the best, given that we hadn’t fully integrated their systems yet. There was already enough trial and error going on.

It was good, in a way. Talking about work gave me something to focus on. Something that wasn’t how badly I wanted to kiss Garner again, how much I was hoping for a sign that this wasn’t ending when he dropped me off, how much I wanted to reach across the seat and take his hand.

“You’re probably exhausted,” he said when we pulled up to my place.

It was at that moment I wished we hadn’t made the deal where I’d pick up the company car and drive us there and he’d do the return trip. It would be easier to drop him off than it was going to be to walk away from him. I hadn’t even opened the car door yet and I was already struggling.

He popped the trunk and climbed out, already walking around to grab my suitcase. I followed, not for wanting to go but needing to be close to him.

As I reached him, he gave me a look I couldn’t quite decipher. Worry, maybe? I went with that, saying “I’m tired” as a way to comfort him.

Only I wasn’t tired. Or maybe I was beyond tired. It wasn’t like we’d gotten a lot of sleep. But that wasn’t why I was off, and I very much was off.

I wanted to ask him in and was struggling with deciding if I should. I wanted to tell him to stay, just one more night. One more day of pretending like this was real life, like this was just our life.

But I didn’t. It wasn’t appropriate. It was a work-trip fling, nothing more. At least not yet.

I thanked him, grabbed my suitcase, and rushed inside, not daring to look back.

I didn’t even have the suitcase fully in the house before I was already regretting my decision.

I should have asked.

I should have said something… done something… been braver.

But I didn’t and wasn’t.

And now I was standing in my entryway, staring at the door, heart thudding, wondering if it was too late. Wondering if I’d just walked away from something that could have been everything.

I was just scared.

Scared that if I took the leap, he wouldn’t be there to catch me.

So maybe this was better.

Even if it sucked.

11

GARNER

I peered at Joss’s empty chair, wishing he was here.

That was the problem with consultants; sometimes they were here, other times they worked for you remotely, and some days they were with other clients. My inner green-eyed monster roared at the idea of another customer being at the hotel with my mate.

What monster? Where? Anyone else comes in here and I’m going to kick their butt.

It’s an expression. Refers to jealousy.