Page 47

As she screams again, I can’t help but wonder if I ever knew her at all. “This isn’t the end! You think the obsession will end if I’m behind bars?”
~~~
I talk Vinny into waiting in the car to see what happens next. I’m hopeful that Alastair may be waiting, watching in the distance but when the officers and FBI agents spread out into the swamp with tracking dogs, my heart sinks. The trees here are sparse so if he tries to run, he’ll be easily spotted.
Porscha was carted away in an ambulance, still screaming like a lunatic, but I don’t know which one. I thought about following her but I’m too worried about Alastair.
Vinny reaches across, grabbing my hand to kiss my knuckles. “Jo. If he wanted to get caught, he would. If he attacked your mother, he’s not planning to go down easy.”
“She could’ve cut herself,” I reply. “She could scream, she surely wasn’t hurtthatbad.” I can’t tear my gaze from the windshield, tapping my fingers along the dash. Where is he?
“Maybe. I doubt this is part of her plan though, Jo. No one knew where she was until this.”
I shrug, staring ahead of me. I wonder how long they will let the search go on.
The one thing I can say is working for Alastair is all the rain. It could leave behind footprints in the mud, but with how much we’ve gotten this week it could also help wash tracks away. He could already be far away from here.
Vinny reaches across the car, grasping my hand to kiss my knuckles. “I don’t think he’s out there, Jo.”
“Then where is he?” I snap, finally turning to my husband. “Porscha was walking down the road bleeding. How far could she walk like that before someone reported seeing her?
“Alastair told us he’s been running his entire life,” Vinny reminds me, and I bite my lip as he brings up the memory. “This is no different. He’s watching, wherever he is. Probably weighing his options, if I know him at all.”
I close my eyes at that, thinking about years past.
“Why do you choose to be alone?”
Alastair glares up at me as I approach, cradling a cup of water in my hands. I was supposed to go home last night, but the serial killer running around has me creeped out and Vinny doesn’t mind when I stay over. It took a lot of convincing, but Alastair stayed too. “I’m not alone. I’m here with the two of you since you won’t let me leave.”
I laugh, sitting beside him on the couch while Vinny is in the shower.
“That’s not what I mean,” I tell him. “I just… you’re so shut off from us. We’ve known you for a year now, but it still feels like you’re hiding.”
Bitterness fills his gaze, and I want to take back the words. We’re only a few months into senior year, and Emeric’s gone. So are the Franks. Alastair supposedly proved too hard to handle, so the Franks returned him to the Florida foster care system. This is our last year, and it seems he’s doing better here than he has anywhere else since he joined the system. Whoever his caseworker is took pity on him, and he’s been able to stay at Citrus Grove so far.
It’s supposed to be short term with his case manager at a bed and breakfast until things are worked out with another family, but Alastair told me he plans to emancipate. He has a job at the General Store, and he’s used to being on his own. Heseems more than ready to separate from the foster care system if they will let him.
“Being alone means no one can let me down, Jo,” Alastair says, turning his gaze to me. Those dual eyes seem to pierce right through mine, and I find myself nodding along at his words. “And I can’t disappoint anyone either.”
I half smile before letting it drop, shifting around on the couch. He’s so closed off about his past, I’ve only gleamed bits and pieces over the last year. “Vinny and I aren’t like that, you know. We both have families that are disappointing, and we disappoint them too. My mom definitely doesn’t think I’m anything special.”
He hums at that, but doesn’t respond. I squirm around in my seat beside him, trying to decide how to ask what comes next. Clearing my throat, I spot Vinny coming down the steps. Now is as good of a time as any.
“Have you… do you ever talk about your mother?”
It’s like pouring ice over the three of us, and behind Alastair I can see Vinny shaking his head. Maybe this is a bad idea.
Alastair sighs. “When I was twelve, my mother had a stroke. She was okay for a while, but she had complications and died. There was no other family fit to care for me, so I went into the system. Before it happened we were busy arguing about my report card. It felt like a regular day, another boring moment in time. But then she died, and in the last minutes of her life she found me disappointing.”
“I don’t know if our approval would ever be enough,” I say quietly, and Vinny nods in response. “Disappointing people is a fear of his.”
“He did go on Death Row for accepting the fault of all the murders,” Vinny agrees. “That’s self-sacrificing as shit. I don’t believe he’s the only killer anymore.”
I nod in agreement, but part of my mind fights me. I’m beginning to doubt Alastair was ever meant to be a killer at all. “If he’s watching, do you think he’ll come out and see us once everyone leaves?”
“With this much activity, no. He’ll keep his distance, if he’s even still nearby. Once he’s caught, it’s over. For all of us.”
I swallow at the words, the finality of them digging into my chest. We’ve grown close to Sterling, who could in turn be Alastair’s undoing. If Alastair did come for us now, Sterling could be watching. He wants to make his arrest more than anything, and if he spotted Alastair now I wouldn’t even have time to talk to Sterling.