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“Well as a gentleman, perhaps you should seek to protect a lady instead of wrestle her,” I teased back, laying on my side in the grass and propping up my head. I knew I had no wrestling abilities; it was a skill never taught to women. But there were always wrestling matches between the men at tournaments.

Curtis, still laying down, placed his hands under his head and turned his face towards me. “You started it. I just finished it.”

I opened my mouth to reply, but couldn’t think of a single come-back, so closed my mouth. Normally there were no awkward silences between myself and Curtis. We could remain in thought, side by side, for hours without feeling the need to say anything. Though admittedly, Curtis was rarely quiet. But this silence felt different. My heart began to beat faster and butterflied fluttered in my stomach.

Curtis propped himself up on his elbow, still turned toward me. He reached over and fiddled with a few strands on my hair that had come loose from under my riding cap. “I like your hair,” Curtis said, somewhat clumsily. “It’s…really, uh, nice.”

“Um, thanks. I…I like your hair too,” I replied timidly, feeling foolish at such childish language and wondering what else to say. I looked down at the grass and pulled up a few blades, letting them loose into the breeze. Curtis let my hair drop and pulled up some grass blades as well. His hands looked so much larger than mine. I reached over and traced the veins on the back of his hand.

In a normal circumstance, Curtis would have made a joke at this point. But he didn’t. He let me touch his hand then turned his hand and entwined our fingers. It felt like such an intimate gesture. I glanced up at his face. He was looking at me, but not in the eyes. His gaze had drifted down to fix on my mouth.

If my heart was racing before, it was nothing compared to what it was doing now. I felt like it was about to beat out of my chest as I felt each heartbeat pound in my ears, drowning out the sound of the rustling trees and chirping meadow larks. Curtis scooted over in the grass, closer to me. He leaned in, still looking at my lips. The rush of emotions that flooded me bordered on frightening.

I hadn’t prepared for this. Hadn’t anticipated this. I didn’t feel ready. I sat up sharply, letting our hands come apart. “It is getting late!” I said, much too loudly. “We better get back.” I stood and began walking toward Storm. I glanced over my shoulder and saw Curtis’s disappointed face.

We mounted our horses and rode back to the castle in silence. I felt like I should say something but had no idea what. Should I explain that I just didn’t think about Curtis as anything more than a friend? That wasn’t entirely true. There had certainly been wandering daydreams during dull history lessons when my imagination ran loose, picturing him rescuing me from some calamity and me showering him with affection afterward. Silly girlish fantasies, I had always scolded myself afterward.

Should I say that it wasn’t a lack of interest, but just that I personally wasn’t ready? Perhaps I should blame my parents and say they didn’t want me being courted until I was sixteen, though that was only a few months away for me. Perhaps I was ready, but just nervous. What would a relationship with Curtis look like? After all, he was a prince. There had to be extra obligations tied into being with him that there wouldn’t be with another nobleman or commoner.

I stole a glance at Curtis. He looked uncharacteristically serious, staring straight ahead and determinedly not looking at me. The sight was disconcerting. Curtis was always so bubbly and full of life, and now he was sulky and moody.

Our horses’ hooves clattered onto the cobblestone courtyard. Still, we rode on without saying anything. At the stables, Curtis dismounted quickly and tossed the reins at a stable boy. He strode out quickly without a single word to anyone.

The stable boy looked surprised by this sullen departure. “What is wrong with him?” he asked me, looking after Curtis, who was now storming up to the castle.

“I don’t know,” I lied, and began to curry Storm.

CHAPTER 7

That night, I couldn’t sleep. I kept remembering Curtis scooting over, leaning toward me, his gaze fixated on my lips. After hours of tossing and turning, I threw off my covers and went into the sitting room. I curled up on the sofa with a blanket but still couldn’t get comfortable. I lit a candle and attempted to read, but my eyes wouldn’t focus on the words. Curtis’ face kept swimming before my eyes, looking disappointed and rejected.

Of course he would look rejected; I had run away from him! I sighed heavily, not sure what to think. If I opened that door, what would happen? I actively woke up my imagination, and let it rush into overdrive, imaging Curtis holding my hand, hugging me close, kissing me.

I jumped as someone entered the room. It was Comfort, sleepily shuffling over. “I thought I heard someone,” she said, and peered into my face. “What is wrong? You leapt a mile when I walked in.”

I hugged my knees. I wanted so badly to talk to someone about the Curtis situation, but also felt embarrassed discussing it. But what were big sisters for if not to confide in about boys? I wanted to ask so many things but didn’t know where to start.

“Have you ever kissed anyone?” I asked rather timidly.

Comfort looked suddenly wide awake. “Why do you ask?” She grinned, and I could tell she already could guess.

“I think um…someone…someone maybe wanted to kiss me today.” I said evasively.

“So you are saying that Curtis tried to kiss you but you didn’t let him?” Comfort asked knowingly.

I looked up, amazed. “How did you know?”

Comfort smiled and slid onto the sofa with me and pulled some of the blanket to cover her legs. “Let’s see, the only boy you ever spend time with is Curtis, and it is obvious he likes you a lot and I’ve been wondering when he would make a move. Secondly, you said that someone tried to kiss you. If he had succeeded, you would have phrased the question differently. Thirdly, you are sitting here looking all gloomy and upset, and if you had actually kissed him, you wouldn’t have been able to stop smiling. So my guess is that you got scared and bolted, am I right?”

I gaped at her.

Comfort smiled broadly. “Big sisters know a thing or two.”

“Do you really think he likes me?” I asked. I knew the answer, but wanted to hear it validated from someone else.

Comfort giggled. “Oh puh-leez. He can’t take his eyes off of you and is always finding excuses to touch you.”

I blushed.