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“A birthday party for your niece? I guess your mother will be there—I mean, Carlotta could say hello to her as well.”
“Oh, she will. And she already loves Carlotta!”
“In that case, you’ve got yourself a few tagalong guests.”
It turns out, I’ve got a party to cater, and my very first suspect to question.
Bring on the cake, and the interrogation.
LOTTIE
If there’s one thing I know for certain, it’s that nothing good ever comes from a children’s birthday party where there’s an open bar.
I had just agreed to Venus’ invitation seconds earlier when Carlotta emerges from the bakery office in a red sequined blazer, gold hoop earrings the size ofhulahoops, and a pair of silver stilettos that I know she didn’t leave the house in this morning.
“Ready, set, go!” she announces, snatching a mini cheesecake off the counter and popping it into her mouth like it’s the exact vitamin she needed to get through this day.
Come to think of it, I might need one, too, so I snatch one up myself.
Her sassy heels catch the light like a dying star and I arch a brow. “I didn’t realize we were attending a Vegas residency.”
She tosses her hair and swipes on bright red lipstick in one Herculean move. “Lot Lot, when there’s an open bar, Iamthe entertainment.”
Venus snorts out a laugh. “Oh, my sister-in-law and her friends are going to love you.”
“Or request a restraining order,” I mumble.
“I don’t doubt it.” Carlotta straightens the lapels of her glitzy jacket. “And I plan on leaving with at least one man’s phone number and a possible marriage proposal.” She shoots me a look. “Just for funsies, of course.”
“And I’ll start writing my apology letters as soon as I get home,” I say, picking up a few more boxes filled with desserts to bring to the party.
“No way, no how.” Carlotta swipes them from me. “You’re the size of a houseboat right about now, Lot Lot. A houseboat that’s guaranteed to sink all of these yum yums to the ground. They’ll be safe with me. Plus, this way I can sample a few on the ride over.”
“Did you just compare me to a floating home?” The part about sampling desserts on the ride over was a given.
“Affectionately.”
Come to think of it, that level of affection is on brand for Carlotta.
Lyla Nell, Carlotta, and I jump into my van and follow Venus on the way to the party.
Before we left, I was tempted to go home to change, but Venus assured me that both Lyla Nell and I were dressed more than appropriately. Carlotta’s level of dress or undress is always questionable.
As expected, the car ride is loud, chaotic, and entirely composed of Carlotta making up increasingly ridiculous reasons why she should be the one to cut the birthday cake.
At least now I know what to expect next week when we’re celebrating Lyla Nell’s second birthday.
“I have the most experience with knives,” Carlotta goes on, touching up her lipstick in the sun visor mirror.
“Yeah, andthatstatement makes me super comfortable handing you a blade in a room full of toddlers,” I deadpan.
It’s happened before and it wasn’t pretty. Both Noah and Everett had to tackle her to the ground in an effort to spare us all from the knife-twirling routine she claims to have perfected.
“You know if you weren’t with me when we found the body, you’d be sitting at the top of the suspect list right along with poor Eliza,” I tell her. “Because if anyone in Honey Hollow was going to take out a whiskey tycoon with a single stab wound, my money would have been on you.”
“Wow, thanks, Lot Lot,” Carlotta beams with pride.
“That wasn’t a compliment.”