Page 36
“The other one was ‘Old MacDonald’ but that’s totally not as sexy.”
She laughed softly. After a minute, she said, “You know, I had nightmares after my parents died. Does he do that a lot?”
He shrugged. “A couple times a week. Stevie tosses and turns and talks in his sleep, but this is the first time he screamed.” Lukas rubbed his neck. “He’s got this thing with his backpack, too.”
“The one with the toothbrush on top and the shoes lined up in a row against the wall? I couldn’t help noticing it was very tidy for a five year old.”
“He won’t unpack anything. He takes his clothes right from the dryer and stuffs them back into the backpack. Keeps his toothbrush and toothpaste packed. And he’s been hoarding change, too. It’s like he’s worried I’m going to kick him out or something.”
“Or he thinks his dad is coming back for him.” That made Lukas’s blood turn to ice water.
“His father’s in no shape. I mean—” Lukas sighed. “I need to talk to someone about legal protections. I don’t want my brother thinking that he can come back anytime he wants and—”
No. He couldn’t go there. Stevie wasn’t going back to Nico. He would make sure of it.
Lukas leaned against the kitchen counter. “The first time I saw Stevie, he was grabbing on to that blanket so tight his knuckles were white. I took one look into his eyes and do you know what I saw?”
Sam shook her head very slightly. She was staring at him with those big green eyes of hers, listening intently. Somehow he needed to tell her this. He needed her to listen.
“Myself. I saw myself as a kid, scared, alone, not having anything or anyone to count on. I knew in that one instant that I’d do everything in my power to prevent him from having the childhood that I had. It’s the least I can do for Stevie—and for Nico.”
He saw her puzzled expression. “He was the oldest. The one who stayed in that house with our parents the longest. He never had a chance.”
“Oh, Lukas.” Sam smiled kindly. Her eyes were soft and warm and just looking at her made him feel a little better. “Maybe someday you can help Nico. And you’re doing a great job. Just don’t be afraid to ask for guidance. For Stevie’s sake. Anyone in his position would need some help dealing with all the frightening changes in his life.”
Lukas cracked a small grin. “Not the least frightening being that I’m the one in charge of him.”
It was never Lukas’s forte to ask for help. No one had done him any favors as a kid. He’d had no real friends. Anything he’d accomplished he’d done on his own. But maybe it was time for him to get over being a loner. He’d do whatever it took for Stevie to be happy. Anything. “I’ll ask the pediatrician. I have an appointment with her on Wednesday.”
“Well, I should be going. Thanks for saving me from eating all the ice cream alone.”
“Thanks for the crisis management help.”
“You didn’t really need me. You have great instincts.”
There went that smile again. The one that made other instincts of his chomp at the bit, ones that made him want to kiss the bejesus out of her and forget all this crazy stuff between them and just get lost in the feel of her lips, her velvety skin. He had to get out of her guest cottage as soon as possible. Because those same instincts were telling him that playing house with her was starting to feel a little too real.
She laughed softly. After a minute, she said, “You know, I had nightmares after my parents died. Does he do that a lot?”
He shrugged. “A couple times a week. Stevie tosses and turns and talks in his sleep, but this is the first time he screamed.” Lukas rubbed his neck. “He’s got this thing with his backpack, too.”
“The one with the toothbrush on top and the shoes lined up in a row against the wall? I couldn’t help noticing it was very tidy for a five year old.”
“He won’t unpack anything. He takes his clothes right from the dryer and stuffs them back into the backpack. Keeps his toothbrush and toothpaste packed. And he’s been hoarding change, too. It’s like he’s worried I’m going to kick him out or something.”
“Or he thinks his dad is coming back for him.” That made Lukas’s blood turn to ice water.
“His father’s in no shape. I mean—” Lukas sighed. “I need to talk to someone about legal protections. I don’t want my brother thinking that he can come back anytime he wants and—”
No. He couldn’t go there. Stevie wasn’t going back to Nico. He would make sure of it.
Lukas leaned against the kitchen counter. “The first time I saw Stevie, he was grabbing on to that blanket so tight his knuckles were white. I took one look into his eyes and do you know what I saw?”
Sam shook her head very slightly. She was staring at him with those big green eyes of hers, listening intently. Somehow he needed to tell her this. He needed her to listen.
“Myself. I saw myself as a kid, scared, alone, not having anything or anyone to count on. I knew in that one instant that I’d do everything in my power to prevent him from having the childhood that I had. It’s the least I can do for Stevie—and for Nico.”
He saw her puzzled expression. “He was the oldest. The one who stayed in that house with our parents the longest. He never had a chance.”
“Oh, Lukas.” Sam smiled kindly. Her eyes were soft and warm and just looking at her made him feel a little better. “Maybe someday you can help Nico. And you’re doing a great job. Just don’t be afraid to ask for guidance. For Stevie’s sake. Anyone in his position would need some help dealing with all the frightening changes in his life.”
Lukas cracked a small grin. “Not the least frightening being that I’m the one in charge of him.”
It was never Lukas’s forte to ask for help. No one had done him any favors as a kid. He’d had no real friends. Anything he’d accomplished he’d done on his own. But maybe it was time for him to get over being a loner. He’d do whatever it took for Stevie to be happy. Anything. “I’ll ask the pediatrician. I have an appointment with her on Wednesday.”
“Well, I should be going. Thanks for saving me from eating all the ice cream alone.”
“Thanks for the crisis management help.”
“You didn’t really need me. You have great instincts.”
There went that smile again. The one that made other instincts of his chomp at the bit, ones that made him want to kiss the bejesus out of her and forget all this crazy stuff between them and just get lost in the feel of her lips, her velvety skin. He had to get out of her guest cottage as soon as possible. Because those same instincts were telling him that playing house with her was starting to feel a little too real.
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