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My back hit the wall as I tried to wiggle out of his grasp. I was trapped. Caged like a bird. He started to unbutton his pants when a noise startled him. Dylan's head jerked toward the sound, and I took the chance to escape.

I kneed him in the cock, causing him to drop to his knees, and I ran. I ran out of the room and to the first door I found. The exit opened to the outside. I was smacked in the face with icy cold air. Tears were streaming down my face as my chest heaved with anger. So much anger. How dare he talk about my mother like that. How dare he try to force himself on me.

I have to get out of this place. I don't belong with these people.

My heels dug into the soft ground as I kept walking with no direction in mind. I could hear the thud of my heart pounding against the quiet backdrop of trees and the faint hum of music inside. I stopped, allowing my heels to sink all the way into the earth to the point it felt like I was barefoot.

I looked up at the clear night sky, my eyes swollen with painful tears. The stars glittered like fireflies suspended in time. For a brief moment, I could feel her. I could feel my mother. She was all around me. She was in the air I was breathing and the ground that was holding me up. A sense of calm settled over me as if she were hugging me using the universe as her arms.

A twig cracked behind me, exploding through the silence. My ears perked, but I kept looking straight ahead, just listening. The silence elongated through the air like music from a speaker. Another branch snapped, cutting through the dense quiet.

I thought I was all alone. I thought that I had removed myself from the rest of the world. I was wrong.

I attempted to look over my shoulder, but I barely had the chance. A large, gloved hand swiftly covered my mouth, muffling the scream that instinctively tried to escape. Everything just stopped right then: my heart, my breathing, the noises between my ears, the voice inside my head. I was frozen, unable to move or think, and then there was nothing. No sky. No breeze. No fleeting voices behind closed windows. Just blackness.

A blackness that left me feeling weightless and unaware.

A blackness that felt endless.

Chapter Two

Poppy

Nine years earlier

––––––––

“Open your eyes, Poppy.” My mother's voice whispered soft and delicately like she was miles away. “Poppy, open your eyes,” she said again, her voice louder and more intense. It was not a dream anymore. She was waking me up.

I stirred slightly, groaning as I rolled over to look at her. “What is it? What time is it?” I asked. “It's still dark out.”

“It's three in the morning,” she said as she gently ran her fingers across my forehead and pushed the tangled mess of hair off my face.

“Three? Why are you up so early? I don't have to get up for school for another four hours.” I rubbed my eyes and blinked a few times as I tried to focus on her face.

I couldn't see her well. It was as if I was stuck between a dream and reality. She was there; I instinctively knew that. Yet, my mother appeared with the opaqueness of an apparition. A layer of fogginess floated over my brain, making me question the validity of my eyes. If I reached out, would my fingers swipe through her like she was made of clouds? I stuck my hand out and touched the hard curve of her elbow.

Nope. She's real.

My mother smiled and said, “I know it's early, but we have to go, Honey.”

“Go? Go where?” I sat up in bed, more alert and awake. “What are you talking about?”

“Come on. Get up. I'll explain it all on the plane. But we need to leave soon, or we'll miss our flight.” She turned aroundquickly and started opening my dresser drawers and pulling out clothes. “I know you're confused right now, but I promise I'll explain all of it to you later. Right now, I just need you to do as you're told. Come on, get up and put some clothes on.”

“Mom, what are you talking about? What's going on?” I pulled the blanket back and jumped out of bed. “Where are we going?”

“We're going away for a bit. On a. . . on a trip,” she answered. Her voice balanced between thought and conviction. “So, let's go. Get packed.” She went to my closet, dug out my suitcase, and then flopped it open on the bed. “Whatever we can fit in here is what we'll take for you.” My mother started stuffing handfuls of clothes inside. Socks, underwear, leggings, and shirts, but there was no method to her craft. She was just tossing things in randomly.

“Mom, what are you doing?” I asked. But my mother either didn't hear me or was ignoring me on purpose because she didn't answer and just kept piling clothes in the suitcase. “Mom, stop! Please, tell me what's happening.”

“We don't have time for this, Poppy!” she yelled. Her outburst was a mix of frustration and fear all at once. My mother quickly inhaled a breath as she ran her hand across her forehead. “Poppy, I swear I'll explain it all to you later. Please, right now, just help me pack.”

Her skin was white and clammy. Sweat beaded across her forehead and trickled down in thin streams. My mother's eyes jittered back and forth in the sockets, and her pupils were as big as dark pools. She looked terrified. I just didn't know why.

My mother had always been docile, gentle, and soft-spoken until she got sick. She moved either slowly or spastic now; there was no evenness to her flow. Her eyes were always void as if she was looking off at something in the distance. My mother's illness had gotten worse over the past couple of years. She would sleepfor hours and only come out on occasion for food. She would be really happy and then turn angry out of nowhere. You never knew what version you were going to get.

Despite her illness, she maintained her appearance. She was always well dressed in matching outfits, with her hair fashionably braided or pulled into a French twist. But the woman in front of me was messy and distraught. Her hair was frizzy and untamed. There was no method to her clothing choice. She was wearing stained jogging pants and a shirt with some band on it that I didn't recognize, probably from her youth. The fabric was thin, worn to the point it was translucent.