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The Queen. The Queen of Alastríona had healed her and she was walking away and she’d—Raevina clenched her teeth. She had almost killed her. That was her whole mission, to kill the imposter. But she’d never imagined, not once, that this female might be the real thing.

Raevina tilted her head to find Cahira with her forehead plastered against the floor. Maybe that’s what she should have done too, but Raevina just stared after the female who was walking away without a word.

Her hand thawed and though she could have sat there stunned for the rest of the night, Raevina grabbed her tunic and weapons, then followed Arianna into the hall.

She’d been sent on a mission with the reward being to claim a chair in her father’s court. But now, Raevina swore she’d do everything in her power to serve The Divine and reclaim Fiadh’s lost honor, no matter what or how long it took.

Chapter Sixty

Arianna

Raevina’s words had shaken her awake from whatever darkness had covered her mind.

She couldn’t leave. They wouldn’t let her join the endless hunt for Rion.

She couldn’t remain in her room. Too many were beginning to worry about her health.

And she couldn’t face the masses. Because she might break down as soon as they asked a question Arianna wasn’t ready to answer.

All she could do now was wait and hope and pray. But was that right? Shouldn’t she be doing more?

Arianna felt for the three threads that still tethered her and Rion together. She tugged on them lightly every single day, running the fingers of her mind across the taunt strands, trying to coax something from the other side.

But he’d been silent. So utterly silent.

Arianna didn’t know what that meant. Could she no longer feel him because of how weak the bond had grown? Was he too far away for that part of the bond to work? Was it even real to begin with?

Tears sprang to her eyes at the last thought. She’d never doubted the legitimacy of the bond before, and part of her wondered why she doubted it now. But it was a small whisper, a horrible voice, telling her a true bond wouldn’t unravel so easily. That a mate couldn’t hurt the other.

Arianna stared at the double doors before her, then walked inside. She didn’t look at the intricate carvings or appreciate the floral designs as she’d once done. She was too tired to even lift her eyes as she trudged up the stairs, feeling like the weight of the world held her back.

Arianna stood before the shelves of the second floor. She knew what she sought, yet didn’t possess the energy to find the tomes. Because if she found anything that pointed her toward an answer she didn’t like, Arianna honestly wasn’t sure she’d survive.

“Can I help you, my Lady?” Arianna slowly turned to Niall’s worried expression. His blond hair was dripping wet and he looked like he’d barely had time to throw on his clothes. Two buttons were still undone at the bottom and one at the top. His shoes weren’t tied, rather the laces were stuffed into his boots and he was breathing hard enough to tell Arianna he’d run all the way here.

Right. The servants had likely been in an uproar upon seeing her. Talon was out searching again and she’d woken to find Ellie asleep in the chair. Her sister never left.

Arianna opened her mouth to speak, but words refused to form. The tears surfaced again and Arianna reached for Rion, begging him to answer. He’d looked so heartbroken when she had commanded him to run and now all she wanted was to command him to return. Whatever it took.

Arianna tried clearing her throat, but her voice was soft and raspy. “I want to read about pseudo bonds.”

Niall didn’t respond at first. He merely stood there as if debating whether he should assist her. If he didn’t, she supposed she’d simply wander until her body gave out. Curl up in a corner maybe. Was this all she’d amounted to? A worthless being without her mate at her side? If he was indeed her mate.

“It hurts me to see you like this,” Niall said.

She clenched her fists. “Then don’t look,” she snapped. But as soon as the words left, so did the anger and her energy with it.

Arianna sank to the floor and drew her knees in. She didn’t care who saw.

Niall knelt at her side and tried again. “I only meant that I want to help.” She didn’t respond. Niall clasped his hands together. “I’m afraid there isn’t a lot of literature on the matter. We have a few stories that detail bonds being formed from those who were traumatized or so obsessed with their lovers that they claimed a bond had formed.” Arianna listened but didn’t move. “I can find those volumes for you, but I have a condition.” Arianna raised her head slightly. “I’d like you to join me for lunch.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Please?” he tried, but she just stared at the floor, studying the swirling designs in the rug that lined the walking areas. Arianna searched for specks of dirt in the fibers, but they seemed unnaturally clean. Everything always seemed so damn clean and perfect. Where were the flaws that made things irregular and beautiful because of their slights?

Where were the flowers with missing petals? The statues with cracks down the sides? Where was the dust that coated books worn with time, or the yellowing pages of tomes that were older than her father?

“I understand you want to find him,” Niall said and Arianna’s stomach clenched, grief flowing through her anew. “But if you continue like this, you won’t be able to help him when you do.”