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Vivian:How did it happen?

I stared at the chat and grinned. They were like little guppies all excited about a tiny bit of bait. I loved these girls.

Kiera:He said those words today.

Audri:What did you do?

Michelle:Did you pin him down and threaten him?

Natalie:While dressed in sexy lingerie?

Vivian:Nudity works better for you? (LMAO emoji)

Audri:Don’t be shy. We’ve all done it too. (Laugh emoji)

Kiera:None of it.

I told them the brief version about his humanitarian mission in Brazil and how he brought me to a place no other woman had been to.

Natalie:When a man lets you in that way? True love.

Audri:How did you reciprocate?

The image of us fucking on the moss and me screaming into the forest flashed across my mind.

Kiera:Gave him what he wanted. (Heart emoji)

Michelle:(eggplant emoji) (Cucumber emoji)

Vivian:(Tongue emoji) (Wink and tongue emoji)

After our hilarious chat, I promised to share more details when I returned to Providence. I went to my luggage, took out theFinding Your HeARTjournal, and began to discover myself. Halfway through the book, I felt a sense of peace I’d never experienced. It was another layer of healing added to what I’d experienced in the lucid dream. I’d work on the other prompts later.

I retrieved the blank journal I’d gotten after Forrest had suggested I try journaling to help me remove my blood phobia. I tried a different approach and wrote:

Dear Adorable Droplet,

Thanks for being in my dream. I have so much to tell me. Here goes . . .

I wrote to the Chococat blood drop who had helped me in my dream. I told it my fears and symptoms. I poured everything out, literally and figuratively. Journaling did wonders. It extracted something from my psyche.

My reaction to the mere thought of blood had already changed from before. My body didn’t cringe like it used to. No nerves churned in my stomach. When I’d written out ten full pages, I closed it and smiled, proud of myself.

Too happy and wired to sleep, I browsed the TV. Apparently Forrest had set up some satellite that enabled me to watch channels from the States. Should I find a romantic movie or something with action and suspense? Or a documentary?

When I stumbled on a science channel with a documentary on blood and how it helped the body heal, I paused. I had no idea what had gotten into me, but my attention zeroed in on the blood cells. The red blood cells looked like flying saucers while the white blood cells looked like donut holes dusted with powdered sugar.

As I listened to the narrator talk, I saw blood from a new perspective. It fascinated me how technology could see into the body, showing me a busy and active world inside of me. I shouldn’t be afraid of it. Doing so would be fearing myself, right?

Realization flowed into me: I wasn’t afraid of the blood itself, but of the terrifying event. I had been a child, experiencing loss for the first time. Now that I knew that day had connected me to the man I love, the trauma shifted completely. What had been filled with terror was now healed with love. Our love for each other changed my outlook on that fateful day. So instead of fear, I appreciated how I had been there at the right moment and the right time just for him.

All the rules I’d set for myself were now checked off. No more one-night stands? Check. Aim for a long-term relationship? Check. Focus on my dreams without worrying about money? Check. Be happy? Check.

He was the shooting star to my wish.

CHAPTERFIFTY-TWO

FORREST