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Derek smiled sardonically. “I doubt I will be missed. Please send my apologies.”

Charlotte clucked her tongue. “As you wish, Your Grace. I hope your business matter resolves in a favorable acquisition for you. I know how upset you were with the loss of your last deal.”

Derek’s head snapped up to look at Charlotte, but she was already through the front door.

Derek turned back into his study and went immediately to the bar cart. He pulled at his cravat, tossing it to the side. He unbuttoned his shirt sleeves and rolled them up to his elbows. He untucked his shirt altogether and caught the sight of himself in the reflection of his window.

He stared at the disheveled man before him and barely recognized himself. He raked his fingers through his hair several times as a feral growl escaped his lips.

Never in his life had he felt this out of control. Not when he was leaving all he knew for a life that held no security or stability.Not when he made his first deal, or when he acquired his first business. In all of years of staring adversity in the eyes, he never felt as lost and helpless as he did right now.

He turned back to his bar cart and hastily poured whisky in his tumbler, not caring that most of the pour landed on the cart itself. He downed the tumbler in one swallow and immediately began to pour another.

Derek eyed the door. He should go. It was his duty, wasn’t it?

He looked back down into his glass then the decanter. There wasn’t enough whisky in all of London to quell the feelings he was trying to force down with the alcohol.

He set the tumbler down and rolled down his sleeves. He should go.

He took two steps and stopped. Eleanor’s bright green eyes flashed in his mind. She was smiling and most likely saying something sarcastic like she was questioning his rules. She always had this look like the cat who ate the canary when she was going toe to toe with him, and it was his favorite version of her.

Eleanor without the pomp and circumstance. Just her in all her natural glory.

He shook his head. No. That is not her. Before he came along and interfered with her life, she was on a destined path, one she was about to fulfill as long as he stayed away.

He turned back to the bar cart, rolling his sleeves back up. He picked up the tumbler and looked back at the door one more time.

If he ended up going, he would say or do something that would throw her life in jeopardy, and he couldn’t do that to her or her family. No. He would stay here.

He threw back the drink and welcomed the burn as it ran down his throat.

Pain. Pain was good; it was something he knew how to control. He would get over this. All he needed was time. And more whisky.

CHAPTER 29

Eleanor stood at the back of the church, looking down the aisle at the congregation settling into their seats. Their wedding wasn’t planned to be a major societal event, yet there were enough dukes, marquises, viscounts, and other members of the peerage to create quite the gossip.

Her eyes landed on a familiar person, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on where she knew him from. The man turned his head, and she realized it was Derek’s solicitor and friend, William Pranton.

A strange stirring happened in her chest. Did that mean the Duke was here? One would think he would be here because society called for it, and after their talk last night, he seemed adamant in seeing this marriage through.

However, there was something in his eyes today that Eleanor couldn’t stop thinking about. It was as if his eyes were sending a secret message for Eleanor to decode before time was up.Looking at the filling church, Eleanor felt as if time was running out.

Perhaps if he showed up again, so she could get one more look at him, she would be able to decipher what his eyes were trying to tell her. If anything.

“Ready?” Charlotte’s voice startled Eleanor.

“I’m sorry,” Charlotte said while she reached out to steady Eleanor. “I thought you heard me coming.”

Eleanor shook her head while her hand rested on her racing heart. “Sorry, I was just looking to see who all is here.”

Charlotte stood next to her daughter, looking out amongst the pews. “It seems like anyone who is anyone is here. Simon and his mother were very particular about who was in attendance. He’ll be very out of sorts when he realizes His Grace isn’t coming though.”

Eleanor’s mouth ran dry at the mention of Derek. She licked her lips. “He’s not coming?” She crossed her fingers behind her back, hoping her voice didn’t sound as desperate and disappointed as she felt.

Charlotte shook her head but kept her eyes on her daughter. “Apparently a business matter came up that he had to see to today of all days.”

Eleanor swallowed and dropped her eyes. “Oh. It must be very important then.” Eleanor couldn’t tell if she was relieved or upset Derek wouldn’t be in attendance. She settled on relieved. If she had to do this, it would be easier if temptation was not present.