Page 116
Story: The Darkness Within Us
“You’re defending him? Why? Because he’s family to you now?”
“Maybe it’s because I don’t want to see you killed or behind bars, unlike your mother.”
“I’m not rash like my mother. I wouldn’t storm the gates the wayshe wanted. I don’t need to be seen. I could do it without ever being caught.”
“Perhaps, but perhaps not. You would risk my happiness by trying.”
Our eyes lock, and it takes him a moment to glean my meaning.
“After everything, you wouldn’t do that to me, would you, Eryx?”
“You want me to give up years of hate for you?”
“I do.”
He looks out at the still water. Were we not trapped on a boat, I think he would pace. His fingers pull at his hair, and it is a full minute before he returns his gaze to mine.
He swallows. “Then consider it done.”
I am shocked by the quick relenting. I thought for sure he would say that he couldn’t. That he wouldn’t. It would make what comes next so much easier.
But he agreed.
And a thought hits me. One I’ve never had before.
What if I didn’t get rid of Eryx Demos?
He does stand between me and everything I’ve ever wanted, but that was before I got to know him. To rely on having him around with his ridiculous hair and pompous attitude and antagonistic nature.
For the first time, I try to imagine what life will be like once he’s actually gone. Just me and the servants and the manor. It’s enough. It’s always been enough.
No more teasing conversations.
No more monster for me to engage with.
No more hearing his laugh.
Gods, and his kisses. No more of that sensual curiosity or amber gaze.
No more of the way he’s looking at me right now.
What if I could be happy with him here?
What if Eryx didn’t put restrictions on me and I was an accomplice to all his schemes? What if we were a team? What if he really did treat me as an equal? What then?
The thought is almost as terrifying as it is exhilarating.
Besides, the rational voice in me thinks, I could always change my mind if he abuses me in any way. I now have the ammunition to go to the king if things change.
“Row us to shore,” I say, my voice low.
Eryx’s eyes don’t leave mine as he obeys.
There is just something intoxicating about a man who knows the true me and wants me anyway. I never talked about anything that mattered with my lovers. Not like I do with Eryx.
He can’t seem to row fast enough, and the suspense makes my muscles coil tighter, just waiting for the moment they can spring free.
Eryx tucks the oars into the boat before managing to exit without the boat rocking even the slightest. He holds a hand down to me, and I take it, letting him help me onto solid ground once more.
“Maybe it’s because I don’t want to see you killed or behind bars, unlike your mother.”
“I’m not rash like my mother. I wouldn’t storm the gates the wayshe wanted. I don’t need to be seen. I could do it without ever being caught.”
“Perhaps, but perhaps not. You would risk my happiness by trying.”
Our eyes lock, and it takes him a moment to glean my meaning.
“After everything, you wouldn’t do that to me, would you, Eryx?”
“You want me to give up years of hate for you?”
“I do.”
He looks out at the still water. Were we not trapped on a boat, I think he would pace. His fingers pull at his hair, and it is a full minute before he returns his gaze to mine.
He swallows. “Then consider it done.”
I am shocked by the quick relenting. I thought for sure he would say that he couldn’t. That he wouldn’t. It would make what comes next so much easier.
But he agreed.
And a thought hits me. One I’ve never had before.
What if I didn’t get rid of Eryx Demos?
He does stand between me and everything I’ve ever wanted, but that was before I got to know him. To rely on having him around with his ridiculous hair and pompous attitude and antagonistic nature.
For the first time, I try to imagine what life will be like once he’s actually gone. Just me and the servants and the manor. It’s enough. It’s always been enough.
No more teasing conversations.
No more monster for me to engage with.
No more hearing his laugh.
Gods, and his kisses. No more of that sensual curiosity or amber gaze.
No more of the way he’s looking at me right now.
What if I could be happy with him here?
What if Eryx didn’t put restrictions on me and I was an accomplice to all his schemes? What if we were a team? What if he really did treat me as an equal? What then?
The thought is almost as terrifying as it is exhilarating.
Besides, the rational voice in me thinks, I could always change my mind if he abuses me in any way. I now have the ammunition to go to the king if things change.
“Row us to shore,” I say, my voice low.
Eryx’s eyes don’t leave mine as he obeys.
There is just something intoxicating about a man who knows the true me and wants me anyway. I never talked about anything that mattered with my lovers. Not like I do with Eryx.
He can’t seem to row fast enough, and the suspense makes my muscles coil tighter, just waiting for the moment they can spring free.
Eryx tucks the oars into the boat before managing to exit without the boat rocking even the slightest. He holds a hand down to me, and I take it, letting him help me onto solid ground once more.
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