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What I’d felt.

“You channel your black magic through the bones of your ancestors. Even without them, their blood runs through your veins. There’s a connection there that none of your relatives have thought to consider, but it seems maybe you could walk through their lives in your dreams if you tried.”

“I have no interest in using anything related to the Hecate line,” I snapped, knowing that every bit of my life that led me here; it had been so that I could die.

Charlotte wanted me to fix what she’d done. And I just wanted to go home.

“You’d be a fool not to. You’ll need it if you’re going to take the Covenant’s place here,” Gray said as I pulled back again. I couldn’t think straight with his hands on me, with that charge between us that defied all nature, making my skin prickle with awareness.

“I have no intention of taking anyone’s place. I’m leaving Crystal Hollow.” I swallowed as I said the words, knowing it was the only way for me to regain any of my humanity. For me to salvage who I wanted to be in the face of all that I’d lost through my life.

I wouldn’t be the devil’s puppet any longer.

Gray sighed as I stepped away, moving toward the treeline waiting for me and the Cursed, who would hunt me down if they could. Even that would be far better than a life as a prisoner. The trees swayed as if they could welcome me home, taking me into their embrace as I put my first foot into the woods.

“Please, don’t make me do this to you,” Gray said behind me. I paused mid-step, putting my foot down slowly as something in that voice made my heart sink. He approached slowly as I turned to watch him, rooted to the spot like the tree at my back. “Stay with me, Witchling.”

“Or what?” I asked, glaring at him. I took a step back as he approached, his actions casual and easy, as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

“Or I will take back what I have given,” he said, reaching me finally.

He touched a single finger to my chest as I tried to call to the earth around me. A whisper from the trees came back, an apology in the wind, but nothing struck out at him. Nothing defended me this time.

His fingernail elongated into a talon, the sharp point of it pressing against my skin. I gasped as it broke through, a slow droplet of blood falling from the wound. It wasn’t the cut itself that stole the breath from my lungs and made my body seize with pain.

It was the suffocation of my magic, the sudden silence as the trees around me quieted. For the first time since I’d turned sixteen, they ignored my call.

“Gray,” I gasped.

He clenched his jaw, dragging his nail down through the center of my chest. The gash he drew bled little for how deep it was, a green mist coiling as it emerged from the cut. He twisted his hand, letting the mist settle in his palm as it slid free from me.

“It didn’t have to be this way,” he said, his face sad as I raised my eyes to meet his. My hands trembled as I grabbed his in both of mine, holding him tight to my chest. Everything inside me was empty, the lack of buzzing in my head making everything…

Silent.

My bottom lip trembled as tears stung my eyes. “Don’t,” I begged, hating the plea in those words. “Please.” Black mist followed the green, gathering in his hand as he stole what he’d given to Charlotte and the first Madizza witches. “I don’t know who I am without it,” I said with a strangled sob.

His face unveiled with what I would have called sort of sadness, if he hadn’t been the one to cause me pain. He raised his free hand to cup my cheek, leaning down to touch his forehead to mine. “You’re mine,” he said as tears stained my cheeks and dropped down my chin onto his hand, which I refused to release. “I cannot allow you to keep the magic you would use to leave me.”

“I’ll stay,” I said, my voice growing frantic as that silence expanded in my head. Nausea churned in my gut, the distinct feeling of being alone in my body overwhelming me. I couldn’t remember a time when I’d felt so disconnected from everything around me, when the loneliness threatened to swallow me whole. “I’ll stay, just anything but that, Gray.”

He sighed, touching his mouth to mine softly as I cried. “I wish I could believe you. I wish I could trust that you wouldn’t leave me, but you tell such pretty lies, wife. I can’t believe a single one of them,” he said.

The bark at my back felt strange and unfamiliar, it felt nothing like the warm comfort of earth. “I’ll do anything,” I said, choking as I tried to wield that magic back into me. As I tried to take back what was mine.

“Then make a deal with me, love. There is something that I want, and that is the only way you will leave this place with your magic,” he said, his golden eyes flashing as the devil beneath his skin wanted to come out and play. I couldn’t stand the knowledge that I was trapped in truth, that there was no way around the deal but to become used to being alone.

“What do you want?” I asked, even as the potential answer terrified me. He already had his body. Surely, that was the extent of his sick, twisted plans.

“I want to finally consummate our marriage,” he said simply, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

My confusion compelled me to question everything. “But we already…” I trailed off, unable to complete the sentence. I couldn’t believe I’d been so fucking blind that I’d given my virginity tothe devil.

“I was wearing a fake meat suit,” he said, the softness of his voice fading away as he laid out his desire. “You had sex with my Vessel, and yes, it was me inside of it. However, you are not the wife of a Vessel, Willow. You are the wife of Lucifer the Morningstar, so you need to consummate withme.”

I sank my teeth into my bottom lip. It was only sex, right…

“Now?” I asked, trying to still the tremble in my hands. “Here?”