Page 37

Happy I wasn’t the first to poop out, I nodded when Todd gave me a look, silently asking if I was ready to leave as well.

We climbed up and out Ryder’s window, the girls making jokes and giggling as everyone piled back into Todd’s Jeep. The seat under me felt extra cold as we waited for the engine to warm. I huddled deep into my logger’s jacket as exhaustion stole into my body and fuzzed my brain.

I didn’t talk much as Todd drove the three in the back seat home first. As we dropped off the last girl, however, he grinned over at me. “Still half an hour before your curfew,” he reminded. “What do you want to do?”

“Go home.” I yawned and wiped at my dry eyes. When I realized how rude I sounded, I dropped my hand. “I’m sorry, I mean, I’m really tired. If you don’t mind…”

His shoulders had slumped but he nodded as he pulled out of the cheerleader’s drive. “No problem. I can take you home.”

“Thank you. I live close to the school on—”

“I know where Dr. Struder lives,” Todd cut in, sending me a knowing smile.

“Oh.” I swallowed, wondering how the people around Osage knew so much about Barry.

We pulled into my new driveway five minutes later. “I’ll see you to your door,” Todd said as he killed the engine.

It was dark, cold, and foreign, so I didn’t argue. I opened the passenger side door and waited for him to come around to me since the sidewalk to the front porch sat on my side.

He walked close; our arms bumped occasionally as we dodged icy spots before finally stepping under the overhang of the porch. Someone—probably Mom—had left on the light by the entrance, so when I turned to Todd to thank him, I could see his face clearly.

He really was an attractive boy. His hazel eyes glittered in the porch light. I found myself eye level with his goatee. There was a bare spot on his chin, just under his lip, where no hair grew. Thinking back on that moment, I have to wonder if Todd thought I was staring at his mouth, while honestly, I was wondering why that tiny little space was bald.

“Did you have fun tonight?” he asked.

I lifted my face. “I like bowling,” I had to admit. Actually, I liked beating Ryder. He hadn’t pouted about losing, but he’d been just competitive enough to make me feel awesome about winning.

“Good.” Todd’s smile was pure pride as he added, “Maybe you’ll like this too.”

My eyebrows wrinkled in question, and I opened my mouth to ask, like what? But he swooped down and pressed his lips to mine so quickly the words muffled in my throat.

I’d like to say shock froze me those two—or three, possibly four, okay, five—seconds we stood there kissing. I was shocked; there was no doubt about that. But curiosity held me motionless as well. I’d never been kissed, felt lame for being so inexperienced. I wanted to know what all the fuss was about, wanted that little item checked off my life’s to-do list.

Been kissed?

Check.

But as I realized I really wasn’t thrilled by the sensation, I grew a little indignant.

I mean, what the heck was he doing? He hadn’t even asked. This was my first kiss; shouldn’t I have had some say in who got to be the boy to deliver such a memory?

Guess not.

Todd seemed to think he had every right because after those frozen five seconds of mashing our mouths together in a most uncomfortable fashion, he stepped closer and wrapped his hand around my jaw, tilting my face up so he could keep on kissing me.

That’s when I jerked away with a gasp.

“G’night.” I spun away from him, reaching blindly for the front door.

For a split second, I feared Mom might’ve locked me out and I’d have to stand outside with him as I dug my key from my pocket. But thank goodness, the handle gave under my fingers. I twisted hard and shoved my way inside, shutting Todd out as he opened his mouth to say, “Grace—”

Once I was safely tucked inside, I licked my tingling lips, then grimaced as I tasted Todd’s foreign flavor. Frantically scrubbing at my mouth with the back of my hand, I wished for the umpteenth time I could have a rewind button to start the entire day over.

Chapter 12

Like the third room in Edgar Allan Poe’s The Masque of The Red Death, I’m overwhelmed with green. A new bud on a spring tree, awakened to the world and beginning to grow or a baby puppy, learning to walk through tall grass, I can only stumble along because I’m inexperienced, a tadpole with new gills as I take my first breath of womanhood. Is every first kiss so awkward? Does every girl feel disappointed afterward…as if she just pressed her mouth to the wrong boy?

* * * *