Page 152 of The Broken Note

But I’m chained here.

There’s no running from a darkness this thick.

“Cadence, you’re hurting me.” Mom yelps in pain when I tighten my grip in response.

I pull her with me to the bus stop. She’s drunk off her face, which makes it a lot easier to maneuver her around. Unfortunately, her flopping arms means she slaps me in the face every time the bus takes a steep curve.

By the time I walk off the bus, night has fallen, my cheeks are stinging and I’m so pissed off that it feels like my skin is on fire.

When I finally wrestle mom to the apartment and stuff her through the door, Vi is sitting in the living room with her phone, a ring light and all her makeup tools.

She sees mom and immediately shuts her camera off. “What happened? Where did you find her?”

“At Rick’s.”

Vi’s face goes pale. “All this time?”

“No, it seemed like a recent thing.”

“Where was she staying before that then?” Vi asks.

“I don’t know.”

“Ugh.” Mom kicks off her shoes and wiggles her toes. She digs her fingers into her thinning hair. “Everyone hates me. Everyone!”

Vi stares at mom with anguish in her eyes. It’s been a long time since we’ve seen mom on a bender. It’s frightening when the person who’s supposed to be taking care of you can’t even take care of herself.

“Vi,” I touch her arm gently, “go to your room. I’ll handle this.”

My sister doesn’t argue. She nods and hurries away, leaving all her makeup things behind.

I stare at my mother’s thin face. A seemingly innocent statement Rick said to me after his birthday party rises to memory.

‘You need to be careful.’

‘Why?’

‘Just… be careful.’

At the time, I didn’t know what he was talking about. But in hindsight, my brother was warning me about mom. That means mom was leeching off him before she even thought of stealing from us.

Disgusted, I glare at her. “Why would you ask Rick for anything after the way you abandoned him? Don’t you have a heart? Shouldn’t you be ashamed to even look at him?”

Mom scratches her wrist. She’ll need a fix soon.

My heart balloons with pain and I feel like I’m going to explode. I need a breath. I need a moment to just… not hurt.

But I force myself to keep being the strong one.

I step into Vi’s room. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” My sister’s long brown hair swings over her shoulder. “It’s just weird, you know? I’d gotten used to life without her. Now, it feels like things are back to normal and the life we were living before was the dream.”

“Vi…”

“What?” Her sweet, innocent eyes fall on me. I want to protect her so much it hurts, but I’m so tired.

‘I won’t let you struggle alone.’Dutch’s words sooth me. What would happen if I abandoned my senses and let myself fall into him? Would I find that protection in Dutch? Would it hurt less than it does right now?