Page 84

So you say. Well, if that is the case, I’d much rather hear about how you ended up in this desolate metal cocoon orbiting a planet you claim you did not destroy. Why are you here alone?

Anya sighs. “Promise you won’t think I’m a pathetic excuse for a human?”

Shock pauses my footsteps through the claustrophobic metal corridor, and I turn to her in confusion.

I do not understand. You are the force that guides my existence. You are perfection and destruction given form. How could you be anything but divine?

She clears her throat and flicks her gaze to mine.

“I’m from the last generation born on that planet. I come from a long line of engineers: my mom, my grandfather, my great-grandfather. After my parents passed away, I left to join the Federation, thinking it would bring me to the stars. I’ve always felt this pull to the stars, but I suppose watching your home world shrivel and die will do that to anyone. You just long for something better because you know it’s got to be out there, right?”

Her eyes begin to make water, which confuses me at first, but now that I can sense her emotions more clearly, I understand this to be a human expression of sadness. It’s beautiful, really, that her lovely blue eyes produce the element that sustains life on my planet. The longing she speaks of plucks at my heart in kinship. I wish to tell her that I know this feeling, that my entire existence is predicated upon it. The endless search for a fearsome divinity who always seems to elude my tentacles; it has carved out a hollow in my insides. I do not feel this emptiness with my little human. Perhaps that is what led me to her moon in the first place. And perhaps that is why I cannot summon the familiar feelings of disappointment at the realization that Anya isnot, in fact, Sindaria, but she might be the divine being I have scoured universes to find.

She wipes the moisture from her eyes and shakes her head, offering me a sad little smile that elicits a fluttering sensation in my organs. I am nearly overcome with the urge to fight something and present her with its corpse, but she has forbidden me from doing so. I will find other ways to honor her, then.

“Anyway, I spent a lot of my time working on the colony ships, and then this post opened. I came to lead the preliminary crew to start work on the station, to turn it into a luxury resort,” Anya says, twisting her long ice-colored hair back into a knot on top of her head. Her vibrations are frenzied, but it’s not from the surge of lust we shared earlier. It’s as if she is anxious to say these things to me.

You answered a call to the stars. Why?

“Why did I come?” she repeats for clarification. Then, like the first rays of sunlight breaking through a sky of platinum clouds, she smiles. She’s stopped walking now and we stand in front of a large chamber. “Here, I’ll show you.”

Pressing her hand to a panel, the wall slides open, and she pulls me inside the room. She gestures expansively and her pulse flutters with pride and happiness.

“The post gives me the chance to lead more crews on bigger, longer missions. Plus, the prelim crew gets their pick of the luxe cabins here,” she says. “I chose this one. It’s the furthest away from Earth, and you can only see it for a few hours in the day when I’m usually out working. I hate looking at it.” She shudders. “Every time I do, it just reminds me how we all failed.”

I admire the room that brings My Anya such satisfaction. The walls, ceiling, and floor appear to be made of a smooth, white stone, polished until it gleams. The window faces the Void Between Things and the infinite stars beyond. Along one wall lies a raised platform, decked in plush pillows and blankets. Anya presses something on the wall, and soft golden orange light filters in, giving the impression of a soothing summer sunset.

You have chosen well, my Anya. This is indeed a comfortable, luxurious place. How clever you are to have secured such a home for yourself.

“Thanks, Leo,” she says, looking out the window. “It’s nice to be able to brag about it a little. I’ve been a little sad not to be able to share it with someone.”

As I come to stand next to her, the loneliness in her ocean eyes pierces my singular heart with another barb of empathy. All this time, I must wonder if it is Sindaria I’ve been searching for or if it’s this odd little human. No one in all the universes feels as perfectly matched to me as this miraculous creature. I have lusted after others, but never have I wished to protect, to serve, to give up my brethren and priesthood…to stay. I want to take away her pain, her loneliness, her self doubt. She may not be Sindaria, but she is every inch a goddess I was made to worship.

I am honored you are sharing this with me. It is a gift I will treasure for the rest of my life.

Anya smiles again as we stare out into the Void Between Things, watching the stars. After a moment, her fingers interlace with mine—a curious, charming gesture.

“I’m sorry you crossed universes and didn’t find Sindaria. I hate to think of your wasted effort, starting your ritual for a silly human on a space station. You should be off exploring other galaxies, where you can find your goddess,” Anya says, sadness tainting her words.

Perhaps I have not found Sindaria, but I have found My Goddess.

I can bear her sadness no longer, and I pull her into my arms for another of her strange, wonderful kisses. She melts into my embrace like the last ice floes of spring and in less than a heartbeat, my desire surges with the force of a tidal wave.

Anya slides her hands around my neck and hops up to wrap her legs around my waist again, and I walk her back towards the cushioned platform along the wall.

“Yes, Leo, the bed—take me to the bed,” she says against my lips.

Are you certain you truly want this to happen, Anya? I would die before I sparked your regret. But know that if you say yes, I will bring you such pleasure, you will be forever changed.

She’s already tugging her garments up over her head as I drop her on the soft surface.

“Someone sounds a little full of himself,” she chuckles, leaning back against the pillows.

I’m momentarily stunned by the sight of her breasts and soft, round abdomen. Nothing has ever been so beautiful to me.

The rest of your garments—may I remove them?

Anya nods and I kneel between her legs to gently pull them down her legs. When I discard them and focus back on her, I am in awe. Her flushed skin is smooth all over, except for a small triangle of light curls covering her sex. Her dusky pink nipples are peaked on the tips of her luscious, round breasts, and I am overcome with the need to taste her all over. As I crawl forward to her, I can’t help but tremble in anticipation. I feel like a fledgling Oseuthan, unloved and untried. She will be my rebirth.