Page 104 of Take Me Home

“Oh, shut up. That’s the flimsiest excuse I’ve ever heard.”

Hazel started to protest, but Sylvia cut her off.

“Seriously, Hazel. I know you think it’s been some huge favor for me to share my family with you these last few years, but don’t you get that we’re sisters? I never had one, and now I do, and it’s amazing. But you get in the way of it sometimes with this inability to let yourself be loved and accepted the way you are. Which is awesome. The way you are, that is, not the way you sabotage relationships.”

“I don’t sab—”

“You do. If you didn’t, you would have called me before you panicked and left or…flipped a table?” She frowned but shook her head like they would have to come back to that detail later. “Or you would have just come here for Christmas like always.”

“My dad is getting married. I had to come.”

“Why?”

Hazel rubbed her forehead where a deep ache pulsed. She was tired of explaining the concept of familial obligation to people who didn’t need a reason or an invitation to see their families. “It would have been a bigger issue if I hadn’t.”

“So, you came for the wedding. But now you’re in a motel in some other town two days before Christmas, and the wedding is…”

“Tomorrow.”

“And you’re going to go back, or…”

Hazel groaned. This was the exact problem. “I don’t know.”

“Seems like avoiding making an issue has made it a bigger issue.”

“Thanks. I see that.” Hazel snapped, then winced. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”

Sylvia gave her a pitying look. “Are you upset he’s getting married?”

Sure, she’d been surprised to see how involved her father was with Val and her kids. His proud presence at Lucy’s choir performance had struck a nerve. Not comparing him now to him five or ten years ago was impossible, as much as the comparison was also pointless. But Val was warm and kind, not the Stepford wife she’d originally pictured. And when Hazel managed not to think too hard about her parents’ relationship, it was kind of nice to see her father with Val. She didn’t want him to be unhappy. She didn’t want him to never change or grow, even if she might have benefited from him doing it sooner.

“I accepted the way things were before, that I just didn’t have deep relationships with my parents. I figured it would never change, so why get worked up about it? Why wish for something else just to be disappointed? But as it turns out…”

“He changed for them,” Sylvia concluded.

Hazel shrugged, not wanting to admit her best friend was right on the money.

“Both your parents should have tried harder, you know. You made everything easier on them because they were going through their own shit. Your momdeservedher fancy job, the life she waited for all those years. Your daddeservedto be a lead reporter after putting in so much work. That’s how you explained it to me—whattheydeserved, why it was all okay that you didn’t get whatyoudeserved: their presence, the kind of love that leaves no room to question it. They should have known better than to let you make things easier on them. You’re still doing it.” She put on a bright smile. “ ‘Don’t worry about me. I’m fine with whatever.’ ”

“I don’t sound like that.”

“Please. Do you know the moment I realized we were actual friends and not just decent roommates? It was when the northside dining hall started making those rocky road cookies.Remember? I was obsessed with them. I had been bringing extras of the chocolate chip ones back to our room for you, but I switched, and you stopped eating them, and I was like, ‘Why aren’t you eating the cookies? Are you sick? Are you on a diet? Are you mad at me?’ ”

Hazel snorted, remembering.

“And you told me you preferred chocolate chip.”

“Wait, that was, like, sophomore year.”

Sylvia nodded slowly, eyes wide, like this proved her point. “It took you living with me almost two years to tell me you had a cookie preference.”

“That doesn’t mean we weren’t friends before.”

Sylvia shrugged. “You’re a tough nut to crack, Hazel. But you’re one of my favorites.”

“Don’t make me cry again.”

“This is actually another special moment for me—you crying. It means I’m your person, too.”