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“You lookin’ at my man?”Dan poked me in the chest harder than was strictly necessary.“Staring’s rude.”
“I wasn’t staring at him.”
“You think I’m blind?”Champagne slopped over the rim of Dan’s glass as she prodded me again.“Find your own.”
I shoved my diamond ring in her face.“You’re the one who’s blind.I’m married.”
“Ring, schming.I know what I saw.”
“Look, lady, you’re drunk.Do us all a favour and call a cab.”
I took a step back and half turned, but Dan grabbed my arm and spun me around.“Hey!You walkin’ away while I’m talkin’ to ya?”
“Get your hand off.”I looked around for help.Would one of the goons step in?“Can someone get this woman away from me?She’s crazy.”
“Who’re you calling crazy?”
Dan shoved me, and I stumbled backwards, arms windmilling until I hit the buffet table.But she still wasn’t done.No, the whole lot crashed to the ground as she piled into me, pulling at my hair.Was this enough of a distraction for Spider?My ass was in a fucking trifle.I grabbed a cream cheese bagel and smushed it against the side of Dan’s head, and she scooped a glob of mousse out of a bowl and threw it over me.For crying out loud, avoid my nose.
For the first few moments, everyone stood frozen.Partygoers, guards, waitstaff, even Ilya.Guess it wasn’t every day they got front-row seats to a food fight.Dan straddled me as she whacked me with a bread basket, and I had to admit that the shorts had been a good choice of outfit—at least I didn’t have to deal with a faceful of her crotch as well.
“Help me!She’s lost her freaking mind!”
Ilya reacted first—mainly because Black was trying not to laugh—and hauled Dan to her feet.She managed to elbow him in the guts before he wrapped her up in a bear hug and threw her at Armand.
“She needs to go.This woman is trouble.”
Armand, for his part, appeared suitably horrified.Possibly he was realising that undercover work wasn’t as much fun as it looked in the movies.
“Honey, you need to calm down, okay?”
“Don’t you tell me to calm down!”
“Sorry.”He addressed the room in general.“Sorry, I thought we were past her anger issues, but… I’ll call Dr.Wallberger again.Uh, I’d appreciate if we could keep this quiet.”
Ilya glared at the partygoers.“No pictures.”He nodded at one of his minions, who removed a phone from a woman’s hand.Guess what?Now she wasn’t happy either.
“Hey, that’s my property.Give it back.”
“He said no pictures.”
This was going swimmingly so far.Two minutes down, eight to go.I licked at the mousse smeared across my lips and found it didn’t taste too bad.Maybe it wasn’t mousse at all?Maybe it was Key lime pie?
“Are you okay?”Black handed me a pile of napkins.“Did that woman hit you?”
“Do I look okay?”
“What kind of a party is this?Call yourself security?Why didn’t anyone stop this sooner?”
I wiped at my face and probably made the mess worse.At least I’d landed in the desserts instead of the smoked salmon.
“Do I have a bruise on my cheek?”
“Hard to tell with the…” Black made a swirling motion with his hand.“That.”
Bryant Angelou looked all kinds of sick.His face had turned quite ashen.“Do you want to clean up?Take a shower?Svetlana has clothes upstairs, and—”
“Nobody goes upstairs,” Ilya snapped.