Page 31

“Genius.” We high fived. “Are you ready?”
I popped a shoulder. “Never more.”
Just like the last party we were at; we walked past a few groups as we approached the house. Conversations stopped. Eyes gawked. Something was up. They were waiting for us to show, which meant word spread that Tati and I were some fucked-up sort of guests of honor or some shit.
I felt it; his gaze on me. It was hard and hot, pinning me down and yet I walked closer. Finally, my blue gaze collided with dark eyes that were just as on fire.
He stood silent at the top steps, waiting for me. He knew I’d show. Almost commanded it. But as we were about to reach the steps, I banked left, act bored, and stood in line to grab a beer.
I had to bite the inside of my cheek to stop the smug grin trying to appear. His sharp exhale felt like razor blades slicing across my back. I reached into a plastic bucket filled with ice, taking out the first thing my hand grabbed. I popped the top and turned around.
“Oh, hey.” I acted dumb. “Have you seen my friend?” I moved past as if he was just some guy; not one who leaves a lasting impression.
His eyebrow lifted. He didn’t say one word as he inspected me. It’s a test. Am I playing him or was he already played into thinking, dreaming and hoping I was real last time we met?
I shuffled on my feet, letting my free hand nervously fidget with the metal zipper on my hoodie. “I need to find her.”
He blocked my path. “Dude, I need a hit. Soon. I only came here hoping to find one. Hey, wait—your friend Johnny, he’ll hook me up right?” I leaned back on my heels hoping to give him a wide-eyed blue look of innocence. His face was stone. Hard. Cold. But he was pissed. It was evident in the way his jaw clenched and the muscle in his cheek ticked. The way his balled fist made its way to his front pocket.
“Sure.”
Surprised, I went with him as he grabbed my hand and led me inside. He out maneuvered me again. Called my bluff. My palms sweated. Would I really do this? How far was I willing to take my act? Keeping a clear mind was my number one rule of both offense and defense. We walked past couples grinding, past people playing cups, past all the bullshit. I expected him to go upstairs but instead he opened a basement door. I couldn’t see the bottom step. It was cloaked in muskiness and darkness.
“No.”
“What? How bad do you need your fix?”
I eyed him and the black void below. “Look. I need one okay. But someone fucked me up a while ago and I can’t go down there.”
He processed my words. One hand stroked my cheek. “I’d never let anyone, or anything hurt you.”
Liar.
He tugged me forward, testing me.
I shrunk back. “Never mind. I’ll find some prescription drugs from the bathroom cabinets.”
I moved back only to be tugged forward. “You’re serious, aren’t you.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” I challenged.
He shook his head. “Go. Go get your fix.” Disgusted, he dropped my hand only to continue his descent. For a minute, he had me fooled. For seconds, I saw him wanting to protect me from the world. It tempted me. Some small twisted part wanted and wondered still what we could be if our fate wasn’t already written across the pages of some bad fairy tale. The kind where the princesses don’t wake up and the villains always win.
Twisting through the crowd I looked for Tati. She was sitting on a couch next to Le Blanc. He shot me a wink.
“Hey! Don’t let her disappear on me again,” he teased, as he dropped an arm around her shoulders.
The weight of another gaze landed on me. It was Johnny. He assessed me, calculating my risk to him and his boy.
I sat, took out my baggie and snorted sugar up my nose. Closing my eyes, it took everything I had not to sneeze or pee my pants since this was funny as all fuck. I kept my eyes closed and exhaled, as if in relief as I put the baggie back into my hoodie and slowly opened my eyes tohis.
I guess he decided to follow me and caught my little performance. I took the glass from his hand and let the alcohol burn my throat.
“Thanks.” I let the empty glass roll from my hand to the floor.
“Tati, I’m out. You coming?” I moved to stand.
“We just got here.”