Page 96
Story: Ruins of Sea and Souls
I blinked at the largest dove, which glared back at me as if I was an idiot. ‘That … that sounds like cheating, somehow.’
‘Goddesses don’t cheat,’ Zera said lightly. ‘They just change the rules.’
I huffed a laugh. ‘So there’s little sense in asking you to send my friends a few doves to fix their messy love lives, then?’
‘Your friends?’ She sounded genuinely surprised as she rose to her feet.
‘No need to sound so shocked about me having friends,’ I said sourly.
She laughed. ‘Not at all, dear. But most visitors I’ve had over the centuries asked for their own blessings, not for help for others. You caught me by surprise, that’s all.’
‘Oh.’ I hunched up my shoulders, not sure what to make of that. Was it a good thing, surprising her? ‘It’s just … they are the ones who spent the past few centuries making life harder for themselves. I have Creon. I’ll be fine.’
Zera did not reply for a few moments as she staggered over to the grain chest against the outer wall of her cottage, dragging her bag along. The doves followed at her ankles, cooing and bobbing their heads, ruffling their snow-white wings with the content air of birds who have completed their mission.
The goddess opened the chest, scooped out a handful of grain, and scattered it on the ground for the birds to eat. Only then, shooing a few curious chickens away with her free hand, did she slowly say, ‘Be careful about that, Emelin. It’s easy to claim eternity, but much harder to actually live it.’
I stared at her, thoughts grinding to a halt for a nauseating moment. She did not look up at me, her gaze focused on her hessian bag as she struggled towards me through the falling dusk.
Easy to claim eternity.What was she suggesting – that I may need those blessings after all? That Creon’s devotion may not go as deep as I believed? That I might lose him if I wasn’t careful enough?
Suggestions I’d have laughed at from any other source – but she was agoddess.
‘What … what do you mean?’ Goosebumps pebbled my arms as the chill of dusk found an unexpected ally in the cold gripping my guts. ‘Hedoeslove me.’
‘Yes, of course he does, dear.’
I knew that tone. Editta had used it to reassure me on those cold winter nights when I was too hungry to fall asleep – to promise me there would still be food tomorrow, to remind me that spring would return soon. True words, most of the time … but peoplehaddied during those winters.
‘But?’ I managed.
‘But love doesn’t like to be taken for granted,’ Zera said quietly, lowering her bag to the ground as she halted and lifted her gaze to meet mine. She was slightly out of breath. ‘Don’t take his devotion as a given. Even the deepest well isn’t bottomless.’
The warning in her voice lingered in the misty air even as she continued her staggered path towards her front door. I stepped aside to let her through, a reflex that was all limbs and no thought. My mind was sliding back to a dark temple room, to scarred fingers moving in the dark –Do you have any idea what this does to me, Em?
But I was solving that problem, wasn’t I? I’d listened to his opinions and followed his preferences, hadn't I?
This time, at least.
There was no squashing that thought once it appeared, bright like quicksilver and just as deadly.
It couldn’t have been the last time. Not in a world that hated him and needed me. Not in a world where we both had too many roles to play, where choosing the role of his lover may cost me lives I didn’t want to sacrifice.
‘Zera?’ I spoke without thinking, whirling around to follow her into the house. The woods were darkening quickly, and in contrast, the warm glow of the fire was blinding. ‘Zera, how in hell am I supposed to choose between people I love?’
‘You love yourself first,’ she said without a moment of hesitation, settling her bag back into its usual corner. Without that impossible weight in her hands, even her words sounded lighter. ‘And then you see who celebrates that and who tries to stop you.’
I swallowed. ‘You make it sound like it’s easy.’
‘One day, it will be.’ She looked back at me, tired eyes twinkling. ‘The trick is not to make too many stupid choices until that time.’
‘That really helps,’ I said sourly.
Her laughter was lively and melodious, joyful like a bird’s song. ‘Of course, dear. Answering questions is what I’m here for.’
In that warm room, surrounded by dried herbs and dark wood, it was easy to take the risk. ‘So how do I break a binding?’
She laughed again. ‘Imayjust have written down the secret and left the note on the bottom shelf of that cabinet over there.’
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
- Page 29
- Page 30
- Page 31
- Page 32
- Page 33
- Page 34
- Page 35
- Page 36
- Page 37
- Page 38
- Page 39
- Page 40
- Page 41
- Page 42
- Page 43
- Page 44
- Page 45
- Page 46
- Page 47
- Page 48
- Page 49
- Page 50
- Page 51
- Page 52
- Page 53
- Page 54
- Page 55
- Page 56
- Page 57
- Page 58
- Page 59
- Page 60
- Page 61
- Page 62
- Page 63
- Page 64
- Page 65
- Page 66
- Page 67
- Page 68
- Page 69
- Page 70
- Page 71
- Page 72
- Page 73
- Page 74
- Page 75
- Page 76
- Page 77
- Page 78
- Page 79
- Page 80
- Page 81
- Page 82
- Page 83
- Page 84
- Page 85
- Page 86
- Page 87
- Page 88
- Page 89
- Page 90
- Page 91
- Page 92
- Page 93
- Page 94
- Page 95
- Page 96 (Reading here)
- Page 97
- Page 98
- Page 99
- Page 100
- Page 101
- Page 102
- Page 103
- Page 104
- Page 105
- Page 106
- Page 107
- Page 108
- Page 109
- Page 110
- Page 111
- Page 112
- Page 113
- Page 114
- Page 115
- Page 116
- Page 117
- Page 118
- Page 119
- Page 120
- Page 121
- Page 122
- Page 123
- Page 124
- Page 125
- Page 126
- Page 127
- Page 128
- Page 129
- Page 130
- Page 131
- Page 132
- Page 133
- Page 134
- Page 135
- Page 136
- Page 137
- Page 138
- Page 139
- Page 140
- Page 141
- Page 142
- Page 143
- Page 144
- Page 145
- Page 146
- Page 147
- Page 148
- Page 149
- Page 150
- Page 151
- Page 152
- Page 153
- Page 154
- Page 155
- Page 156
- Page 157
- Page 158
- Page 159
- Page 160
- Page 161
- Page 162
- Page 163
- Page 164
- Page 165
- Page 166
- Page 167
- Page 168
- Page 169
- Page 170
- Page 171
- Page 172
- Page 173
- Page 174
- Page 175
- Page 176