Page 102
Story: Ruined
Wouldn’t you like to know?I smirk.
“Yes, absolutely I would love to know.” Gabriel gives me the “no shit” look.
“Love to know what?” Tobias’ voices comes from behind me. My head snaps to the side, as my older brother smiles down at me.
Jumping from the bar stool, my arms wrap around his neck. Tobias and I might have had our issues, we’re siblings, but he would do anything for me. And just like Gabriel, I hadn’t realized how much I missed him until now.
“It’s good to have you back,” Tobias whispers into my ear. I nod, tightening my grip around his neck. “Don’t get too hugged out, Mom’s going to be in here any second now.”
As if she heard her name, Mom comes running in. “My baby!” she screeches. I barely take my arms off Tobias when Mom grabs me, pulling me into her.
“You’re never allowed to leave me again, you hear me,” she cries. I don’t say anything, I can’t break her heart telling her that I’m leaving with the guys. I know it’s going to be difficult, and I doubt Dad is going to just let me go, ya know being a mafia princess and all. But I can’t stay here. Even if I’m feeling better, talking and feeling like my old self again, I can’t stay in the house that Henry was in as well. The memories are just within reach, threatening to break through at any point.
“Ight Ma, let her go.” Tobias sighs.
Mom slowly lets me go, tears flowing down her face. Giving her a sad smile, I ease back onto the bar stool, taking a drink of my coffee. Awkward silence fillsthe kitchen, Gabriel and Tobias leaning against each other as Mom can barely hold herself together.
Where’s Dad?I sign.
Mom looks over at Gabriel, while Tobias stares straight at me.
“You’re not staying, are you?” Mom asks. Before I can answer, the timer goes off, giving me at least a few seconds before I answer them.
Tobias pulls the cinnamon rolls out, frosting each one before plating two for me. Sitting it in front of me, I don’t pick the fork up, confused about why they’re not answering me.
“For fuck’s sake.” Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Dad is in the doghouse because Mom heard what you said in his office.”
The air gets trapped in my lungs, my eyes peering over at Mom. It dawns on me that this is why she’s crying so hard. She heard about Henry being a creep growing up, and Dad never told her when I went to him about it.
“I’m so sorry, Blake, I had no idea.” She cries harder. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I get to my feet, stepping in front of Mom.
“I’m okay, Mom.” My voice cracks. Hearing me only makes her cry harder, her arms once again wrapping around my waist.
“I’m so sorry, I failed you, I can’t believ—” Mom stops talking, barely being able to finish her thought. Instead, I hug her, rubbing her back. I never thought about the pain she would carry for what happened to me. As much as I wish I could take it away, I can’t. What’s done is done, and as much as I want to take it all back, to go back and erase all the pain, all the hurt, I can’t. And I’m not entirely sure I want to. If I hadn’t gone through it all, I wouldn’t have met Jace and Ryker, and I can’t imagine my life without them.
So, while I hold Mom as she cries, I feel my own tears falling from my eyes. Crying for the girl that had her innocence ripped away, for the girl that never had a chance at a normal childhood. And for the adult that has to learn to heal herself.
I take the last bite of my cinnamon roll pushing my plate away.
Are you and Dad going to be okay?I ask.
Mom catches a few words, frowning. “You asked about Dad and me?”
I nod my head, getting up from the island, taking my plate to the sink.
“We’ll be okay. I just… I know there are things he can’t tell me, but this wasn’t something that involved his business, it involved our child. I—”
Shaking my head, I cut her off with a stern look. It took thirty minutes for her to calm down. I don’t think I can handle another round of her crying because she blames herself.
“Sorry, I’m fine. But yes, your father and I will be okay. He’s been the same stubborn asshole for the past twenty-five years. You don’t need to worry about us.” Mom smiles, reassuring me. I take a deep breath, putting my plate in the dishwasher. “Can you tell me about the two men upstairs?”
Blushing, my lips tip up to a smile.I love them. I can’t even begin to explain the feelings inside.
“You love them?” Mom’s eyes widen for a split second.
I nod.
“Both?”
“Yes, absolutely I would love to know.” Gabriel gives me the “no shit” look.
“Love to know what?” Tobias’ voices comes from behind me. My head snaps to the side, as my older brother smiles down at me.
Jumping from the bar stool, my arms wrap around his neck. Tobias and I might have had our issues, we’re siblings, but he would do anything for me. And just like Gabriel, I hadn’t realized how much I missed him until now.
“It’s good to have you back,” Tobias whispers into my ear. I nod, tightening my grip around his neck. “Don’t get too hugged out, Mom’s going to be in here any second now.”
As if she heard her name, Mom comes running in. “My baby!” she screeches. I barely take my arms off Tobias when Mom grabs me, pulling me into her.
“You’re never allowed to leave me again, you hear me,” she cries. I don’t say anything, I can’t break her heart telling her that I’m leaving with the guys. I know it’s going to be difficult, and I doubt Dad is going to just let me go, ya know being a mafia princess and all. But I can’t stay here. Even if I’m feeling better, talking and feeling like my old self again, I can’t stay in the house that Henry was in as well. The memories are just within reach, threatening to break through at any point.
“Ight Ma, let her go.” Tobias sighs.
Mom slowly lets me go, tears flowing down her face. Giving her a sad smile, I ease back onto the bar stool, taking a drink of my coffee. Awkward silence fillsthe kitchen, Gabriel and Tobias leaning against each other as Mom can barely hold herself together.
Where’s Dad?I sign.
Mom looks over at Gabriel, while Tobias stares straight at me.
“You’re not staying, are you?” Mom asks. Before I can answer, the timer goes off, giving me at least a few seconds before I answer them.
Tobias pulls the cinnamon rolls out, frosting each one before plating two for me. Sitting it in front of me, I don’t pick the fork up, confused about why they’re not answering me.
“For fuck’s sake.” Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Dad is in the doghouse because Mom heard what you said in his office.”
The air gets trapped in my lungs, my eyes peering over at Mom. It dawns on me that this is why she’s crying so hard. She heard about Henry being a creep growing up, and Dad never told her when I went to him about it.
“I’m so sorry, Blake, I had no idea.” She cries harder. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I get to my feet, stepping in front of Mom.
“I’m okay, Mom.” My voice cracks. Hearing me only makes her cry harder, her arms once again wrapping around my waist.
“I’m so sorry, I failed you, I can’t believ—” Mom stops talking, barely being able to finish her thought. Instead, I hug her, rubbing her back. I never thought about the pain she would carry for what happened to me. As much as I wish I could take it away, I can’t. What’s done is done, and as much as I want to take it all back, to go back and erase all the pain, all the hurt, I can’t. And I’m not entirely sure I want to. If I hadn’t gone through it all, I wouldn’t have met Jace and Ryker, and I can’t imagine my life without them.
So, while I hold Mom as she cries, I feel my own tears falling from my eyes. Crying for the girl that had her innocence ripped away, for the girl that never had a chance at a normal childhood. And for the adult that has to learn to heal herself.
I take the last bite of my cinnamon roll pushing my plate away.
Are you and Dad going to be okay?I ask.
Mom catches a few words, frowning. “You asked about Dad and me?”
I nod my head, getting up from the island, taking my plate to the sink.
“We’ll be okay. I just… I know there are things he can’t tell me, but this wasn’t something that involved his business, it involved our child. I—”
Shaking my head, I cut her off with a stern look. It took thirty minutes for her to calm down. I don’t think I can handle another round of her crying because she blames herself.
“Sorry, I’m fine. But yes, your father and I will be okay. He’s been the same stubborn asshole for the past twenty-five years. You don’t need to worry about us.” Mom smiles, reassuring me. I take a deep breath, putting my plate in the dishwasher. “Can you tell me about the two men upstairs?”
Blushing, my lips tip up to a smile.I love them. I can’t even begin to explain the feelings inside.
“You love them?” Mom’s eyes widen for a split second.
I nod.
“Both?”
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