Page 57 of Romeo
She clings to me, and I hold on, pulling her into my lap and cradling her as she grieves for what is probably the first time.
“I have to at least clean up.Things have to be made right.”
“You don’t have to do anything,” I tell her.“Not a single thing but heal.”
“How can I heal?He’s the only reason I’m alive.Do you know that?He—” She trails off.
“Tell me, Jules.What did he do?”
“The missing years, as you call them,” she chokes out.“I wanted to die when I finally got back.I tried and he—” She chokes on the words, her entire body trembling.“He found me and—he wouldn’t let me die.”
Suicide.I hold onto her harder, hoping that my embrace will ease the pain of her past.She felt so low, so broken that she thought not existing at all was the better option.Which only makes me angrier when I think of all the horrible things Odie has likely said to her over the years.
“He loved you.”
“I don’t know why.I didn’t deserve it.Odie was right.I didn’t earn his love.”
“Love isn’t earned,” I tell her.“It’s a gift.”
“It’s one I didn’t deserve.He’s dead now.And I can’t shake this feeling that it’s my fault.”
“Then tell me why you feel that way, and I’ll help you find the truth.”
She falls silent for a moment, just leaning against my bare chest.It feels so good to hold her.To feel like I might stand a chance at chasing away some of the monsters hiding within her.
The demons that still cling to her soul.
And in this moment, I vow to destroy every single one of them even if it’s the last thing I do.
“Come on, let’s get you some tea, and we’ll talk.”
Nodding, she pulls away from me.And as she does, she tries to shield her face, looking anywhere but at me.So, I cup her face with my hands and force her to look at me.
“Don’t hide, Jules.Not from me.”
“I don’t know any other way.Whenever I open up, about anything, people run.”
I brush a tear away with my thumb.“Then let me show you that I’m not going anywhere.”
Thirty minutes later,I’ve put a shirt on and have finished making tea.I also put in a call to Tucker that will hopefully ease some of her pain.
I put some honey into both mugs then carry them into the living room where Jules is sitting on a plush leather couch, staring at an empty fireplace.
“Here.”
“Thanks.”She looks at me with red-rimmed eyes.
“You’re welcome.”
Romeo is lying on the floor beside her where he’s been since we came downstairs.It warms my heart to see that he wants to soothe her pain too.
“I’m sorry for that.For falling apart.”
“Don’t ever apologize to me.Not for that.”
“I was trying to sleep, and that stain just kept popping into my mind.My grandfather loved organization.He wanted everything neat and in its place.He would be appalled at the state of this house.”
“He would understand,” I tell her.
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