Page 77

They all remained in the castle, refusing to leave me alone, wary of what their king might do in this condition. When I heard my uncle order someone to find Phoebe and bring her to Întuneric no matter the cost, I nearly took his throat. I’d commanded that no one was to go near her, and no one was to bring her here. I’d loved her and lost her, just like the others.

I pummelled the wall again.

It was no use. The enemy I really wanted to strike at was me. I’d had her trust and betrayed both it and her. My claws dug into the stone, frantic for a mooring in this detached state. I was floating unfettered through the ether without Phoebe to ground me, despondent and lifeless. I had become the one thing I had once feared. The future was nothing more than a yawning abyss of more loneliness.

My heart ached for her. This was more than the typical madness that accompanied being away from one’s mate. It was the realization that I had no one to blame but myself. Unlike my mother and Cassandra, there was no outside force fighting against me. This time I could have done something different to make her stay, but I hadn’t.

Yes, the compulsion of the bounty had forced me, but I could have told her, warned her, instead of putting all my hopes on Erik’s shoulders. I’d been too afraid to tell her, too frightened that she would leave and I would never see her again. I snorted at my stupidity and the self-fulfilling prophecy of it.

It had been fear that kept me from telling her, not the hope that Erik could find a solution. I’d been kidding myself with that. Deep down, I knew there was no way out. It was my own selfish desire to keep thingssafebetween us.

“Lucien?” came a hesitant and familiar voice.

I whirled on the other vampire, and Elijah jumped back. I growled at him, barely able to form words. “What do you want, Elijah?”

“What’s happened?” he asked.

You told me to trust you!Her words, her voice, wouldn’t give me any peace.

“She’s gone.” I didn’t need to elaborate on who I spoke of. There was only one thing that mattered.

“What? Why?” he asked, baffled.

You said you’d keep me safe!I hadn’t, lying to her from the first word to the last, but I didn’t know I should be protecting her from myself.

“I hurt her.”

“You couldn’t.” Elijah didn’t understand. He saw how affected I was by Phoebe, how I constantly searched for and obsessed over her, but the other man couldn’t understand what had happened.

“I was in Salem. You fought by her side to secure the witches. We all expected you two to merge your kingdoms. Rumors have already started. They are calling her Phoebe Silvano, the Twice Crowned.”

“Don’t say her name!” It tore at me to hear about her.

All along, I was in danger from you!

Stubbornness glinted in Elijah’s eyes, and he braced himself for a blow before saying, “No. You need to hear this. Phoebe is still in danger.” I grabbed him and threw him against the wall. “She doesn’t know who to trust in her new court!” he managed to choke out before my grip cut off his ability to speak.

My fingers tightened on his throat. I couldn’t hear anymore. I loved her, and she wouldn’t see me, wouldn’t listen to me.For once, will you listen to me and leave me alone!I roared my anguish as the hated words echoed in my mind.

My Uncle Ambrogio appeared, throwing me off Elijah, who coughed as air returned to his lungs. “You need to help her. You’ll sit here in your cold castle while your mate struggles, surrounded by enemies?” Elijah croaked, having to force the words past his bruised throat.

Did the much younger vampire sounddisappointed? Did he not realize how close to madness I was? How close to death he was? With barely a thought, I could separate his head from his shoulders. Ambrogio stepped between us as I coiled to lunge for Elijah again.

“The boy is right.”

Elijah straightened at the hated term but nodded at the Elder’s support. I stumbled back from the pair, not able to face their condemnation on top of my own. “You think I’m choosing to stay here?”

My laughter sounded mad even to my own ears.

“Aren’t you?” Ambrogio asked.

More insane laughter burst from me, the sound wholly without mirth. “She doesn’t want me!” I roared, and it broke me even more to say it out loud. “She doesn’t want me,” I repeated, my voice breaking slightly.

Elijah’s eyes softened with understanding, but my uncle’s stance had not changed. The older immortal crossed his arms over his wide chest, frowning at me.

“You are a fool, Nephew.” The first time he ever called me such, and it was a reprimand.

“What do you know of it,Uncle?” I sneered.