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Even from across the loft, Rose could see Drew’s chest heaving. Their eyes were glassy… maybe it was just exhaustion.

When she realized Drew wouldn’t say anything else, Rose took a deep breath and crossed the apartment. As she approached Drew, they lifted their head. “I know I shouldn’t have…”

“Let me know what maternity pictures you like and we’ll send them.” Rose couldn’t let them finish their sentence. Just the smell of their skin wafting into Rose’s nose was too much for her to resist.

I have to get the fuck out of here.

She stormed back to the door, gritting her teeth with every step.

“I’m sorry.” Drew turned to look at her.

With a nod, Rose shrugged. “Thanks.”

Grabbing the door knob, Rose hesitated. Maybe they were already crossing the loft, planning on swooping her into their arms and making it all better. But even if they were, it wouldn’t have worked. Rose needed time to figure out what she wanted for herself.

When she turned to look at them, Drew just shook their head, stammering for words.

She grabbed the door handle and left.

Maybe it would be the last time she ever ran down these stairs. A part of her knew it could be.

The staircase was stuffy but the street wasn’t any better. Rose’s breath hitched in her chest as the ninety degree day hit her lungs. Trying to breathe through it, she stood on the small step outside Drew’s building for a moment.

Her mind was still catching up to her body. Getting the email on the train. She felt like she could hear them in Tommy’s voice.We’ve decided to go with another candidate, as you know Drew is talented and we’re excited to see what their unique vision can do for our client.

Every siren, dog bark, and car honk felt too loud to Rose’s ears. If it was really over, she knew Drew had ruined this neighborhood for her. Forever.

31

DREW

Standingin their now empty loft, Drew couldn’t figure out what they were supposed to do now. So they did the only thing they knew how to.

Pulling their phone from their pocket, Drew called Diana. “Are you busy?”

In the two hours it took her to get into Manhattan, Drew stared out the window for most of it. Spending the rest of her time pacing.

When Diana was off the train, Drew left their apartment and met her at Phoenix on 13th Street. It was one of their favorite queer bars in college, more lowkey than Henrietta’s or Stonewall but just as dancy.

Rubbing their forehead, Drew waited for Diana at a standing table outside.

“Hey.” Diana opened her arms to hug them. “What happened? You guys seemed great yesterday?”

After they hugged, Drew shook their head. “Do you wanna get completely fucked up? Like I’m talking college freshman levels?”

Diana almost laughed in their face. Her hangovers were no joke at this age, nearing thirty. “If that’s how you wanna play it.”

Clearly, Diana thought Drew was avoiding their feelings and of course… they were. But they couldn’t even say enough words to explain what was going on. They knew they’d have to deal with it eventually but right now, their heart ached and they couldn’t speak. All that was left was to try and forget about it long enough that they could process it.

“It’s always fucking Shannon.” Drew shook their head as they groaned.

Throwing her arm around their shoulder, Diana led Drew inside.

The inside of Phoenix was always dark, even at noon on a bright summer day. It was part of the appeal, feeling like a gay medieval dungeon. It was barely 6 pm when Drew and Diana went inside so the place was essentially empty with the exception of the lanky bartender and an older gentleman at the end of the bar.

“Rough day?” The bartender laughed as they stumbled over to the counter.

All it took was a nod for the bartender to pull shot glasses from behind the bar.