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I’m sorry her life has been such a shit hole. “It’s my job to read people. We spent a week together, and I saw your potential. I’m glad if I helped you see it, too.”

She smiles, and for the first time I concede she’s a pretty girl. Without all the makeup, her features are delicate, and even if her eyes aren’t stunning blue, they’re lively and full of emotion.

“So I owe you more than I can repay. First with the believing in me,” she exhales a laugh again. “That sounds so dumb, I know. Now you let me stay here with Cammie...”

“It’s the right thing to do. Only an asshole threatens a helpless mother and child.”

“I’m not so helpless.” She cuts me a look from under her lashes, but I let it pass.

Anger burns in my chest. Star’s blackmailer has pulled her out of college, dislocated her and her daughter, wrecked my home.

“You’re not as strong as I am,” I growl. “I’m ready to kick this fucker’s ass. You have no idea.”

Her lips press together and she nods. “Either way, you’re really special to me.”

With that, it’s time to say goodnight. I stand and pat her shoulder. “There’s more good people in the world than bad. Keep doing the right thing, and you’ll meet them.”

She touches the top of my hand on her shoulder, but I pull away heading to my room. I don’t expect to get any sleep, but I’m hitting the road early. My chest aches at the thought Melissa might not text me, but just as I’m plugging in my phone it lights up.

Mom said we can have the party at one. If that gives you enough time.

Pain mixes with relief at her words. I’ll be there. Thank you.

She doesn’t respond, but I’m still encouraged. I still have a chance of getting back inside that wall, and when I do, I won’t fuck it up again.

Chapter 7: Birthday Break

Melissa

Mom is in the living room with Dex, and I can hear her playfully chatting with him while he lines his trains up on her coffee table.

“Is this the station?” she asks in a high-pitched tone. “Are the trains wishing Dex a happy birthday?”

His little voice answers a loud Yes! And they continue chattering.

My hands tremble as I stand in the kitchen dropping slinkies, tiny containers of bubbles, and toy trains in decorated plastic bags. I’m doing my best to stay calm, breathe through my growing anxiety as I finish the party favors for his few little birthday guests.

They’ll all be here in less than ten minutes. Lane is invited, of course, and two little boys from Dex’s Mom’s Day Out class. They’ll only stay for an hour, then I’ll be alone with his daddy. Another tremor moves through my stomach at the thought.

I’m not strong enough for this yet. Mom’s being very supportive, although she repeatedly slips up and makes some comment about how she can’t believe this is happening. She blames herself, saying if she hadn’t gotten sick last fall we wouldn’t have postponed our ceremony, and we’d already be married. I counter saying yes, and again I’d be stuck in a marriage built on secrets and lies. Elaine also blames herself, which is ridiculous. She didn’t force Derek to break his word. I haven’t even spoken to Patrick.

A quick glance around the kitchen, and the blue and red train decorations are all in place or draped over the table. His cake is an elaborate blue tank engine with red and yellow piping and a bright yellow 1 on the side. It’s a special delivery from my favorite client and baker “Aunt Bea,” and a bright red candle is waiting to go on top. It’s so cheery, Dex will love it. I can hardly look at it.

I’m not sure how much longer I can take the building tension waiting for his guests to arrive. Silently, I pray Derek won’t be the first one here. Then I silently add another prayer that I won’t cry during my son’s first birthday party. I’ve been crying every other time of day. My determination is to make it one hour without tears.

The doorbell rings and I jump. Stepping to the passage between the kitchen and the living area, I watch my mom catch Dex’s little hand and help him toddle to the door.

“Let’s see who it is, Dexy!”

My eyes close as I hold my breath, releasing it in a rush when I recognize the squeals of children and realize it’s Hannah and Evan from Mom’s Day out. Right behind them are Cheryl and Tatum.

“Hi, guys!” I manage to say, surprised at my ability to act so calm.

I will be calm. Dex will have a happy first birthday party. Hugs are exchanged, and I take the gifts into the kitchen. The little boys go immediately to Dex’s train station setup on Mom’s coffee table and start picking their engines.

“Such a lovely apartment,” Hannah says, giving Mom a hug. “It’s so nice of you to play hostess!”

“I thought it would be easier for everyone if we had the party in town,” I lie. The truth is I can’t have Derek back in the cottage. I’m afraid he won’t leave, and I won’t have the strength to force him.