Page 98

The door clicked shut, and Charlie peeked around the corner. Maybe Mack’s scent would still be lingering in the doorway. Maybe Mack was standing outside the window, and she could get a glimpse of her as she walked down the stairs.

She stepped into the room, and her chest dropped. No scent. No Mack.

With a sympathetic smile, Ben held out a cardboard box the size of a paper ream. His hands hung in the air, the heavy box probably weighing on them. He waited a moment then handed it over. “She left this for you.”

The box remained between the two of them until Charlie finally took it and held it to her chest. Mumbling a quiet “Thank you,” she finally met his gaze and noticed how red his eyes were. “You’re tired.”

“Nah.” He rubbed the edge of his eye and moved to the couch. He slipped off his shirt to his tank and shoved the pillow under his head. “If you need me…”

“I know where to find you.”

Clutching the box to her chest, she dimmed the fairy lights on the way to her bedroom. Once alone, she sat on the bed with the box laid down on the blanket in front of her. One deep inhale later, she removed the lid and revealed a stack of papers with a letter on top. Her fingers shook as she lifted the first sheet, and read the first line:Charlie, My heart is heavy as I write this…

By the second line, a warm mist filled her eyes and she brushed a fallen tear from her face. The words turned fuzzy through her unfocused gaze. Was she really in the emotional state to see whatever it was? Strumming her fingers on the bed, she considered just tossing it. Or burning it. At the bare minimum, sleep on it and review it tomorrow.

The paper stared back at her, egging her on.

Gnawing on her lower lip, she considered all the options for a few seconds longer.

Then she read it.

Charlie,

My heart is heavy as I write this. I wanted to say this to you in person, but I understand why you don’t want to see me. What you read was all true. I used you to build my manuscript. I had never met anyone like you, and I was instantly drawn to you like a flame. You inspire me.

But what started out as learning about your background through your stories changed to me learning aboutyou. I used your strength. Your courage. Your beauty, grit, and resilience. I took all the best pieces from you and built something.

I’m asking, begging really, for you to read the enclosed manuscript. The heartache you will read on these pages, it's not yours. It's mine. It's what I feel when I’m not with you and when I picture my life without you.

Falling in love was never in the cards for me. I’ve never loved before, and if you’d asked me a month ago, I would’ve said it’s probably not worth it.

But now, I would say yes. It was worth it. A lifetime of pain of being without you was worth the days of loving you.

Please read it. And if you never want to talk to me again, I’ll understand. Out of respect for you and your need to process, I won’t contact you after this. You hold all the cards. However you want to play this out, I’ll honor your decision.

I love you.

Mack

Midnight had nothing on Charlie as a surge of energy shifted her crumbling body upright. She tucked her knees to her chest and opened the document with trembling fingers.

Crooked Roots by M. Ryder

For Charlie.

She shines, that’s for damn sure. Not like a diamond. Nah. She’s so much more. The cosmic universe exploded and sprinkled down a moissanite star that landed directly at my feet.

I watch her through the crowded room. The drunk business suits, crystal champagne flutes, and pianist at the white baby grand in the corner are nothing but a mild, amusing backdrop.

She makes her way, and I swear everyone turns to look at her. Maybe they do, maybe they don’t, but that’s what it feels like. And I struggle because I don’t want them to look, but I don’t blame them. She’s a goddess, a mirage. How can anyone not look?

I’m nervous. Like straight up shaking, trembling, sawdust mouth, nervous. Any second now, she’ll see me, and she’ll know. To the depths of her core, she’ll know she’s too good for me. And it’s not like I’m chopped liver, or fried pig skin, or whatever gross food analogy people use to put themselves down. I got some shit working for me. But it’s just that she’s too good for anyone. The rest of us are mere mortals, genuflecting at her feet, blessed with the opportunity to breathe in the same air she does.

I’m still watching her from afar. Like a goddamn creeper. But how do you approach someone like that? This divine being that floats across the room. And yet, she looks my way. She’s staring at me, and for a second, I do the thing. You know the thing. I turn to see what’s behind me. It was a wall before, but surely there’s someone behind me who’s the intended recipient of her light.

Nope, still a wall. My brain refuses to accept that the smile is meant for me.

Oh God, she’s coming towards me, and my heart is kicking in my chest, wailing like a trapped animal. I’m sure it’ll explode in the middle of this bougie-ass party, but I’m okay with it.