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“I like that about him,” I said. “I like more things about him with every day that passes.”
“Have you told him that?”
“I…”
“Yeah, I thought so. Holding back,” she said, “making him bend over backwards to please you. I guess you’re entitled in a way, but these things have a habit of coming back to bite you in the ass, if you’re not careful.” There was a rustle of paper, and then. “Jesus! Is that the time? If I don’t go home now, there won’t be any point in going before I need to come back.”
“Can you pass a message on to him before you go?”
“Depends what it is.” Amrita’s hackles were raised; I could feel it.
“Ask him to Skype me before he goes to bed. Tell him it doesn’t matter how late it is, that I’ll wait up for him.” Silence followed my statement. “I want to check if he’s alright,” I added quickly. “It sounds like he’s having a really shit day. He might need someone to talk to, someone to make him feel better.”
“I’ll tell him,” she said.
“Thank you.”
“And Finn?”
“Yeah?”
“Just so you know, I’m equally hard on him. He doesn’t get a free pass to mistreat anyone, like he did to you. But…”
“It’s in the past.” I finished for her. “Time to move on.”
“Bingo! He gets it. I’m going to buy that hat, so don’t let me down.”
“I’ll try not to.”
It was nearly midnight before the familiar sound emanated from my laptop speakers. I rushed over to accept the call, Cillian’s profile filling the screen as I slid into the chair. It was a different Cillian than the one I was used to seeing. This one looked like he’d been through the wringer. He had tousled hair; shadows under his eyes, and sported dark stubble. He was also shirtless, my eyes drawn to the perfect symmetry of a muscular chest that I hadn’t seen since that fateful day in his office when we’d last fucked. “Oh, I’m sorry,” I said before he could speak. “I was waiting for a call from my boyfriend, but I seem to have clicked on an Only Fans account instead.” I let my gaze drift slowly over him, making no attempt to keep the heat out of my eyes. “Whatever you charge, though, I’m happy to pay it.”
Cillian laughed, the sound weary. “For you, it’s free. Actually…” He sat up straighter with a slight glint in his eye. “There is a price.”
“Name it. First-born child? The one remaining ear of my cat?”
“I suddenly feel very naked,” Cillian drawled. “Perhaps I’d feel less so if I weren’t the only one sitting here without a shirt on. Only if you’re comfortable, though.”
He’d barely finished his sentence before I was pulling it over my head. I dropped it on the floor and Quasimodo made a beeline for it to check out its functionality as a new bed. Because in his little cat brain, there couldn’t be any other reason for me doing something except to please him. We really needed to have a word about who was in charge.
Cillian devoured me with his eyes as I leaned back in the chair, my nipples immediately pebbling from the scrutiny. It was strange. We’d seen each other naked more times than I could count on the fingers of both hands, but this felt new, like we were two completely different men, and therefore, back to square one.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t call you when I was supposed to,” Cillian said with regret in his eyes. “I wanted to.”
“I know. Amrita explained.”
“Did she? Or did she make things worse? Because sending her into a situation is a bit like playing Russian roulette, and you’re never sure what you’re going to get. She has very strong opinions, and she’s not afraid to share them, even if the other person isn’t that keen on being forced to listen to her take on things.”
“She was fine. We had a good chat. She made me see a few things in a different light.”
Cillian frowned. “Like what?”
“Just… things.” I leaned closer to the screen. “How are you? Are you okay?”
“I thought you’d be angry with me. Or at the very least, upset. I didn’t even make it a week before dumping you for work. Which is precisely what I promised I wouldn’t do.”
I considered the words I wanted to say, Amrita’s little speech still ringing in my ears. “It’s unrealistic to think you’ll always be able to put me first. You run a business. I understand that. And sometimes, things will come up. Important things. All I ask is that you try to put me first most of the time. Which, you’ve been doing,” I added quickly. “And I’ve really appreciated it.”
Cillian looked taken aback by my words. “I’ve been trying.”