Page 49

“Back? January? In Detroit?” Sterling looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.
I’m still holding his hands, and I guide them to my belly. “Yeah, because traveling later in a pregnancy is sometimes not the best. I really want to be here to have the baby, too. I know if we talk to my parents, they’ll change their plans and make sure they’re here for us, although the baby won’t be born until spring, early April or mid-April, I think.”
I get a confused blink back at me. Sterling has gone completely blank. It hasn’t sunk in yet. I knew it would take a few minutes. We didn’t plan this. It was a surprise. We’ve always talked about having kids, and we both want them. We were just busy traveling and writing songs and, honestly, just getting to know each other. Yes, we’ve been getting to know each other for two years, buteven when someone is perfectly open and lovely, it still takes a while, and we don’t want to rush anything. I know I made threats about babies when we first met, but I was content to wait until we were both ready and the time felt right.
However, sometimes life just makes you get ready, and you have to do your best to make it the right time.
“You’re…I’m sorry, we’re…we’re having a baby? In April?”
“That’s right,” I say softly.
He takes me with him when he plops down on the bed. “Oh! Oh, wow. That is a surprise, isn’t it?”
“It is, yes. I was surprised too. Very. I haven’t taken a test yet, but I’m three weeks late, my boobs are sore, and I’m tired. I didn’t even think about it until last night, and then I was really thinking about it, and I just know. I can take a test, but I’m pretty sure. I’m never late.”
“Oh! Oh, wow. Weland… I…I’m so excited right now that I don’t even know what to do.”
“You look shocked and scared. Not excited,” I point out.
That starts the grin that was just waiting to break out. “I am excited. This is my excited face. You know that. You know me. You know me inside and out. You know me in ways no one else knows me. You’ve made me a part of your family, and now we’re going to be our own little family. I think that’s why I’m so stunned. This is…this is my dream. I know my cousins have come around lately, but I wasn’t…I never felt like I…I never had a mom or a dad.”
I wrap my arms around his neck and sit on his lap. “I know.” I kiss him gently. “I know what this means. You absolutely don’t have to have grown up with a dad to be a great dad. We are going to raise our son or daughter together, and they will be so loved. We have great people in our lives to love on them lots as well. Not just my mom and dad or my brother, but your cousins too. They will adore our kids. I feel like it’s going to be true becausewe’ll make it true. We already know babies heal the past and soothe wounds. Look at little Michael. He’s a miracle, and that’s when your cousins really made the effort to have us in their lives.”
“I’m…I’m so am…amazed. I really am,” he stutters.
I love that he still can’t get the words out. Sterling isn’t someone who really talks a lot, but he’s never speechless either. This is a good moment for us. I’m going to remember the sheen of tears in his eyes and the awe-inspired smile on his lips forever.
“I’m so happy you’re happy,” I murmur.
“Oh, yes. I’m so happy! Every single day with you is a happy day, but this day…wow,” he says breathily.
“I shouldn’t have stolen Beans’ thunder. Do you think he’ll ever forgive me?”
“Yes.” Sterling laughs, his shoulders shaking. “Yes, of course he will. Beans is the most gentle old soul who ever lived. He’s going to make a great big brother.”
“I think so too. He’s so patient and kind. One of the best souls I’ve ever known. This won’t stop us from traveling or living. Our baby will see the world. He or she will love music. They will love the world, and they will love life. They will be a part of something bigger than they are. I want them to have the kindest soul too. As a mother, that’s what I want to give our child or our future children if we have more than one baby.”
“Oh, Weland.” That’s all Sterling says as he hugs me tight. I don’t need him to say anything else. Just having him close in my life as the love of my life is more than enough. But then he goes and makes it impossibly better. “I love you. I’m always going to love you. Let’s get married again.”
“Okay.” By some miracle, I am somehow dry-eyed, though it won’t last. I feel the burn coming on, but at least I can squeal and kiss him and laugh with him and smile with him before we start crying. Together. “Of course I’ll marry you again. I’ll be yourwife, and I’ll be your partner. I’ll be a parent with you, and I’ll do anything with you that you want to do.”
Sterling smirks. “Anything?”
I smack his shoulder. “Of course you would go there. Maybe one day. Just hold that thought.”
“Believe me, I’ll never forget.” He takes my hand in his. My left hand. “I need a ring! I don’t have a ring!”
“That’s okay because I’d really like for us to pick one out together. I like making decisions with you. I like exploring with you. I love you, and I love doing life with you,” I say earnestly.
“I love doing life with you too. It’s the best way to do absolutely everything.”
There were a whole lot of years and a whole lot of time that neither of us saw this marriage working or even thought about making it real, but I’m so glad we did. I’ll always be thankful Smitty got me Beans and phoned Sterling with that SOS call just because I had a bit of a meltdown that I didn’t even mean. Sometimes, people leave our lives, but the best people can also come into it.
There’s never too much music in the world, and there’s never too much love.
Ever.