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Christ.Until yesterday, he hadn’t been certain he wasn’t going to be indicted for arms trafficking.
For the past two weeks, he’d given Sophia the time and space to sort out her feelings.
Nathan took one hand off the wheel to dig into his jeans pocket. His phone landed in Lachlan’s lap. “Here.”
Lachlan stared at the device. “I’m not sure what to say.” He shifted uneasily on the seat and rubbed at the ache in his chest.
“How about this? Hi, Sophia. I’m an ass. Please forgive me because I will never find another woman as incredible as you for as long as I live.” Nathan glanced at him and arched a brow. “See? Easy.”
“Piss off. It’s more complex than that. Maybe she doesn’t want to be with me after all the shite I put her through. Did ya ever think of that, yabawbag?” Lachlan glared at his friend. His heart pounded in a furious rhythm. “And turn the heat down.” He wiped the sweat from his hairline.
Nathan gave a derisive snort. “The heat isn’t on. You coward. You don’t deserve her.” The look he sent Lachlan was calculating. “Maybe I’ll give her a ring, offer to comfort her.”
A snarl burst from Lachlan’s throat. Red colored the edges of his vision. All the shite he’d dealt with in the last month and the fear that Sophia might walk away simmered below his skin. He’d love nothing more than to release it through his fists. “If you weren’t driving, I’d have a go at ye.”
Nathan’s jaw went rigid. “If there were a place to pull over on this damn road, I’d let you try so I could beat some sense into that thick Scottish skull.”
Tension, impenetrable as a dense fog, hung between them for the rest of the drive.
Nathan pulled to a stop in front of Lachlan’s apartment building. He leaned his head back against the headrest and let out a deep sigh. “Give Sophia some credit. She’s stronger than you believe. You’ve been given a huge gift, my man, your freedom and the chance to start over with a woman who loves you.”
He turned to meet Lachlan’s eyes, and his crystal blue gaze wouldn’t let Lachlan look away. “It’s time to bury the past and live your life.”
Lachlan’s throat was too tight to get out any words. He grabbed his bag and climbed from Nathan’s truck, lifting his hand in a brief wave as his mate drove off.
Thankfully, he made it to his apartment without encountering any other residents.
He might no longer be front-page news, but that wouldn’t stop some of his nosier neighbors from trying to corral him into conversation. He breathed in stale air and shuffled down the hall with a weary sigh before tossing his duffel on the bed and heading to the bathroom.
A splash of cold water on his face snapped him into focus.Christ.His reflection mocked him. He hadn’t looked this haggard on the worst days of deployment. Pasty skin, dark circles, misery lurking in his eyes. He needed a shave.
There hadn’t been a minute of the past two weeks he hadn’t thought about Sophia. At first, he’d tried to convince himself that he couldn’t entrust his heart to a woman who might betray him, but the excuse rang hollow. Sophia was a decent woman to her marrow. She wasn’t Nadia. Her only thought had been to try and help.
She wasn’t the problem.
His fears were.
He wiped his face with a towel and headed to the kitchen, straight for the bottle of Scotch.
After blowing the dust off a highball glass, he gave himself a generous pour and added a splash of water. A taste of home.
He stared into the amber liquid. Was Scotland his home anymore?
His apartment’s barren, beige walls were proof he hadn’t made the States his home, either. He’d been too caught up in his past to realize there were people in his present who cared about him. People who wanted him to have a future.
Nathan and Ryder had never wavered in their support. Lucas Caldwell kept his agents digging until they found evidence against Jared. Sophia had believed in him enough to risk her life and career.
It was time he returned the favor.
Once the FBI publicly exonerated him, he could start again. Admiral Dane had promised to pull considerable strings to salvage his reputation. When Lachlan asked why, the admiral said simply, “Sophia believes in you.”
He wandered into his living room, the one place in his apartment where his walls weren’t so empty. His finger traced the figure of the black-haired Highlander.
What if he stayed here, built a business and a life where his heart lived?
Mo Chridhe. My heart.
Would she give him a chance to show her that a life with her meant more to him than his past? In her presence, his ghosts had ceased to be ghosts and instead had become memories he could put into perspective and move on from.