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CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE

Anna went to hang out with the others of her kind, leaving my co-workers and Jake in the moon’s dwindling light.

I’d save Jake to deal with last. He was being so quiet. He must have been stunned.

Rachel engulfed me in a hug, then patted me roughly. “You did it. ”

Gina was crying too hard to talk. She said it all in her hug.

I saved Meaty for last. Meaty squeezed me tight, then grabbed my shoulders. “Don’t look back, Edie. Just go. ”

After all this, Jake finally stood. “Can I get a ride home, Sissy?”

“Sure. ” I held out my hand to him, and he took it.

* * *

It was good to have a reason to stay composed on our walk to Dren’s car. Otherwise, I would have lost it. The Shadows spoke from the shadow of a lamppost that they made look like a scar on the ground.

“Shall we fix him for you?”

I looked to Jake. He seemed baffled. I shook my head. “No. He and I need to talk. ”

“As you like. No one will believe him anyhow. ”

The Shadow changed back to a shadow, and I unlocked the doors.

* * *

Dren’s car was nicer than mine. I wondered darkly if I’d get to keep it. Jake and I drove along in silence. I almost hoped he’d speak first—I sure as hell didn’t know how to start this conversation.

“Jake—”

“Turn here. ” He pointed at an exit coming up.

“But that’s not—”

I looked at the hand. It wasn’t Jake’s anymore. I gasped, and then realized Jake was transitioning to look like Asher.

“It’s the way to my house. I don’t have cab fare on me. Plus, I doubt we’d see any cabs,” Asher said, in his gentle British accent.

I hauled my car over onto the on-ramp. A fleet of emergency vehicles was sprinting the other way—the Shadows had a lot to fix, before dawn. “You—you! You touched him, didn’t you!”

Asher shrugged, as if it wasn’t worth making the point. “It wasn’t hard. Your brother loves you, deep down inside. I just had to convince him you’d be better off without him, to get him out of town. Four hundred dollars didn’t hurt, either. ”

I beat on my steering wheel.

“Why? He’s safe—I saw him before I left tonight,” Asher said.

“It’s not that, dammit—” I sank forward, shoulders slumped. I was glad the Shadows had kept him clean so far, despite his four-vial-a-day habit of paw-print juice. But who knew if the Shadows would keep him clean, now that I’d been shunned? Also, with the demise of his hookup for Luna Lobos, I had no doubt he’d find harder things to sell. He’d never know that all of its purported health benefits had bee

n a placebo for him, entirely in his mind.

I followed Asher’s directions to his house, without saying anything. I pulled up into his driveway, in silence. He turned toward me. “No matter what happens to your brother, she’s right. It’s safer this way. ”

“I know. I agree. ” I stared at my steering wheel. I couldn’t deny it after tonight. I’d been struggling to play along ever since I’d gotten stabbed. It was lunacy.

“Edie—being shunned—it’s everybody. Shapeshifters too. ”

I kind of figured as much, but I hadn’t admitted it to myself. I nodded at the dashboard of my car.

“Edie—”

I turned toward him and stuck out my hand. He looked blankly at it. “Really? Just a handshake?”

I looked at him in the half dark. “No. ”

He reached for me, and I leaned into him. Our lips met halfway and I kissed him hard, and he kissed just as hard back. Everything I’d ever screwed up I wanted to let go now, and just think about this, because if I thought about anything else I would cry.

And in thinking too much about not thinking about anything, I missed it. His lips pulled away. He pulled back, studying my face like he was afraid he’d forget it—which I knew, for him, was a lie. He didn’t say anything else, just turned, opened the car door, and walked away. He didn’t look back. I knew because I watched him, hoping he would.

I started my car back up again and pulled out of his driveway.

* * *

It was almost dawn when I reached my apartment’s parking lot. I pulled into the first spot I saw and walked my way in. A person emerged from the shadows and joined me.

“I want my keys,” Dren said, walking alongside me.

“Aren’t you supposed to be shunning me now?” My feet made crisp sounds in the snow.

“Shuns usually go into place at dawn. Gives aggrieved parties a last chance to settle scores. ”

“I suppose that’s type of technicality a Husker would know. ”