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She’d promised to give him time.He’d agreed to a question a day.Demanding more might push him into clamming up altogether, and that was the last thing she wanted.
The shadow moved, and Bethany stepped back from the railing.Zach emerged into the night air, his head bowed and his posture weighted in a way she’d never seen before.Beneath his white T-shirt his shoulders were tense, and his movements lacked their usual animal grace.
She quickly returned to the bedroom and got back into bed.Heart thundering, she waited.But an hour later, he still hadn’t returned.
The thought that he was out there, grappling with whatever demons haunted him, made her leap out of bed again.Opening the door, she was about to head downstairs when the light from underneath the door at the end of the corridor caught her eye.
The toy room.
Mouth dry, she approached and turned the knob.
Zach jerked around and faced her, hand poised midair where he’d been stroking a leather arm band attached to the St Andrew’s Cross.
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“Bethany,” he breathed.
Pain radiated from him in waves, hitting her full force.Had she not been holding on to the door knob, she would’ve reeled backwards.
“Tell me what you need, Zach,” she pleaded.“Tell me how to make it better for you.”
His harsh exhalation shook his whole body.Haunted eyes locked on hers from across the room, communicating a thousand demands that remained unspoken.
Earlier last night, she’d come up with the plan to use sex to coax Zach into giving her what she needed from him.
Then after the incident in the alley, she’d abandoned the idea of using sex as leverage because she’d believed it would jeopardize everything.Sex was the most precious thing in their relationship.For now.
But she realized she’d didn’t have to use sex that way.She could use it to communicate with the man she had fallen for.The man she’d begun to suspect she couldn’t live without.
Releasing the door, she nudged it shut.
It was time to give it her all.It was time to go for broke.
She crossed the room until she stood arm’s length from him.Slowly, she untied her robe and let it fall to the floor.
His pained exhalation was jagged with threads of deep arousal.
Heart pounding, she reached out and trailed her fingers along his jaw.
“Show me how to make it better, Zachary.”
He swallowed hard and shook his head.“I can’t.I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t lose me.I promise.”
“No,” he snapped.“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.I’ve learned the hard way that nothing lasts forever.You think you’re falling in love with me?—”
“I don’t think.I know.I love you, Zach.”
He jerked backward as if he’d been shot.He was pale, and he shook his head, over and over, denying the words that twisted like a live gauntlet between them.
“No.What you feel isn’t love.It’s just your brain reacting to great sex.”
This time it was her turn to jerk.Ice engulfed her, and she dropped her hands from his face.“Don’t disparage my feelings.”
“I’m stating the facts as I’ve experienced them.”
“As you’ve experienced them?Don’t presume to tell me how I feel.”