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The tears haven’t stopped and my heart snaps in my chest. He’s right. I thought the only reason he was throwing his hate around at me was because of some sick King game that they liked to play. Riddles, hate sex, vicious abuse. It’s all their foreplay. Now he’s saying that it wasn’t the case with me? I’m confused. Hurt, dazed, and confused.
His hate is deeper than a flesh wound. I see it now. It’s in his bones and it’s there to stay.
My eyes close. “I’m sorry.”
He flies off me and I slowly stand up from the ground.
“I didn’t know. I didn’t know it went deeper than that.”
He grips at his hair and tugs on it. “You need to get your shit sorted, because I can’t be around you much longer.” His eyes come to mine. “I’m going to break you beyond repair if it’s not done soon.”
“Don’t—” I shake my head, stepping forward. My fingers itch. I need to make him feel better. Just for right now. Not for tomorrow or yesterday, I need to make him feel better for right now. He stills, his eyes staying on mine.
“I’m going to break you, Tillie.”
“Then don’t, Nate,” I answer through a whisper, my hand going up his chest and curling around the back of his neck. I stand on my toes and yank his face down to mine, my eyes searching his. “Don’t break me.”
He’s so close I can feel his heavy breath on my lips, and then I lean forward, his soft lips brushing mine. I kiss him softly, not an open mouth kissed, but not a closed mouth kiss. It’s an in-between kiss. He keeps still, not moving.
“Kiss me,” I whisper against his mouth, my heart thundering in my chest.
I bury my fingers into the back of his hair and kiss him again, lighter, taking his bottom lip into my mouth softly and then kissing him again. His lip twitches and then slowly opens as his arm hooks around my back, pulling me to him. I jump up, wrapping my legs around his waist without either of us breaking apart. His tongue slides against mine, our lips meshing together. He walks me backward, laying me down onto the grass again, our lips not leaving each other. I open my legs for him as he settles between my thighs, his kissing turning gentle then hard, each stroke of his tongue a reminder of his harsh words earlier tonight, but every suck a token of his reasoning. He rips the jacket open, his hand coming to my breast as his thumb flicks over my nipple. I feel his cock press into me, and I sit up as he tears the jacket from my body and flings it to the side, our kiss finally breaking. His eyes are wild, his chest heaving as he takes in my naked body against the dirt.
“That’s the last fucking time you let Brantley put something of his on you—including his fucking cock. Do you understand?”
When Nate bears his soul to you, he takes yours as collateral. I nod in agreement, because I know that I’m done with that. I love these guys, more Brantley than any of the others, but Nate is right. I can’t do this either, but he was partly to blame for that, always testing just how far he could handle it like the damn masochist that he is.
He removes his shirt and throws it to the side. I inhale broadly as I take in all of the shredded hard lines of his body, just as they are hit by the moonlight. He dips and presses kisses up my thighs. I lean back, my head rolling with my eyes. His mouth comes to my pussy and I bite down on my lip, not wanting to make a sound. His tongue flicks around my clit and I whimper. Another tear slides down my face. Why am I crying? It feels good. This feels good.
I look down at him between my thighs, his shoulders flexing beneath his tattoos. He looks up at me and I lose it, my orgasm coming together as quickly as possible. He licks his lips, climbing up me while unbuckling his belt and unzipping his zipper.
I lay back down, his eyes staying on mine. They move to my lips and to my eyes again. Like he’s memorizing this moment. He slowly sinks inside of me and my eyes flutter closed.
“Open,” he orders, slowly grinding inside of me before extracting himself.
I obey, opening my eyes to his as my hand goes back behind his neck. My core clenches with my thighs and I grind up to meet him, eager to chase the high.
He lays back down, his mouth coming to mine. He grinds into me slowly. In and out, at a slow pace as his mouth kisses me without breaking. Sweat drips off my flesh, as nothing interrupts the sound of our bodies sliding together and the moonlight shining down on us. My orgasm builds to all new highs and I fist his hair, my kisses getting more desperate and needy. His hips thrust into me hard but remain at the same pace. He grinds into me, only every time he goes in, it’s enough to push me over the edge. I moan softly as my orgasm shreds through my body, setting off explosives through my system like nothing I’ve felt before. He jerks suddenly, groaning into my mouth and biting down on my lip until a sweet metallic tang slips down my throat. We lay for a little bit, waiting for our bodies to calm.