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The inside of the portal flickered, like a spark of two rocks clashing together then nothing happened.

We need more magic to regenerate fully.

“Then you’ll have to wait,” Thane murmured, seemingly out of breath himself. He peeked over his shoulder. “Set up camp. We’ll rest here for now.”

Chapter23

Layala dropped to the soft, green forest floor and leaned her back against the stone circle. The quiet hum from within it warmed her skin but there was no pull or draining of her magic. She closed her eyes, breathing in steadily. The tremors in her hands and legs and weakness in her muscles brought up a rush of anxiety from her time in the tower. She could almost feel the straw from that disgusting bed poking into her, taste the dryness in her mouth, the sting of cracked lips, experience the ache and gnawing at her stomach from raw hunger. Reina’s terrified face popped into her mind and the line of crimson that welled up when Tenebris drew a blade across her delicate neck. Piper’s scream as Gunner was torn away, lost to the lake forever. Everything seemed to hit her all at once.

Thane wouldn’t even look at her. He blamed her for the loss of Gunner, didn’t he?

“Are you alright, Layala?” Aunt Evalyn asked gently.

Her heart began to pound and despite how weak she was, her eyes shot open, and she shoved to her feet. Worry lined Aunt Evalyn’s face as she stared, as they all did.

She must run. She needed to feel free, to get away from those memories. The itch of her hot skin, the rushing of her breaths—if she didn’t move, she would burst. Everything around her seemed hazy except those memories of death and despair.

Forcing one foot in front of the other, she started off slow, clutching a hand to her heaving chest. Then she sprinted, tearing through the trees at a wild pace. Her surroundings zipped by in a dark-green blur, low hanging branches snapped across her face, but she barely registered the pain.

“Layala!” Thane’s voice sounded far away.

Run. Run. She couldn’t stop. The ache in her body stole the anxious, repetitive thoughts that seemed to be on a wheel sliding through her mind. She wanted to grip her hair and scream but kept pumping her arms instead. Hot tears streamed down her face. She leapt over a fallen log and slammed down on the other side. Quiet feet flew over the dense foliage. She weaved around tree trunks until she broke free of the forest and came to the edge of the island. Wide open space was less claustrophobic. The lake glistened as the sun peeked out from the dark clouds above offering some sense of relief.

Layala collapsed to her knees, barely able to catch her breath, and tipped over onto her side in the ebony sand. Then she rolled flat on her back, and her sword jabbed into her, but she ignored it as she stared up at the sky. A drizzle of cool rain pitter-pattered on her face. Why did so many bad things happen? Why did people die when she was around? Did the Maker care about their suffering? Didn’t he hear their pleas?

Come to me. I will help you,that now-familiar voice of the Black Mage whispered.

Layala slapped her hands on the sides of her head. Stop it! Leave me alone.

I feel your suffering. I will make the hurt go away. But I need you to find me.

No!She silently screamed in her head. Because that’s where the voice was. Maker, maybe she was losing her mind.

I truly need you. I’ve waited so long.

A quiet rustle of bushes drew her attention. Layala tilted her head to see Thane emerging from the break in the tree line. For once he appeared to breathe heavily. She clenched her jaw and turned away, wanting to hate that he followed her but the tightness in her chest eased slightly.

Silently, he traipsed over the tall grass and lay beside her in the sand. In serene quiet, they both stared at the sky for a while. The deep pull of his lungs was almost a lullaby to calm her nerves. The rustle of wind in the treetops and chirps and songs of birds with the steady lull of the water, seemed to put her in a trance. The tightness wound around her chest loosened some and the tears dried. She felt like she could breathe again.

“I forgot how fast you are,” he said reverently, as if breaking the peace was a sin.

She pursed her lips and said nothing.

His hand brushed against hers, and then warm fingers gently nuzzled their way in between hers. “Why won’t you look at me?”

“I could ask you the same question.”

“I’m sorry,” he said. They were quiet again as she waited for an answer rather than an apology. “I feel I’ve failed you. You had to fight me rather than help them.”

“You thinkyoufailedme?” She sat up and tossed her arm toward the water. “You were not in control of yourself out there. I was. They begged me for help.”

He pushed up to his feet and stared out over the water. “Gunner is dead because I commanded him to be here. He’s dead because of me. Just like all the others I’ve lost but at least they died in a battle for something greater. To protect the lives of their families and the people they love.” He did finally look at her, wild-eyed, face twisted into agonizing fury. “Gunner died for a stone we don’t even know exists for certain. It’s nothing more than rumors or hearsay. Maker above, I am weary of my people dying needlessly.”

She unintentionally moved back at the wrath emanating from him like a blast of wind. She’d seen him angry a few times, but this was different. This was—anguish. “I’m sorry this is your burden. And I’m sorry I couldn’t save him.”

“I’m not blaming you,” he snapped. He smacked a palm to his chest. “It’s on me.”

Gritting her teeth, she stood up and matched his ferocity. “No, you don’t get to do that.” How many times had she blamed herself for all of this and he refused to let her? She’d even suggested if she wasn’t alive, it would end this chaos, but he wouldn’t allow her to speak of it. With flared nostrils he stared down at her but stood still. “This is on your father and the Black Mage. It’s them, not us. There would be no war to fight, no Void to destroy. We would never be here if it wasn’t for them.” A long breath passed through her lips.