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“Because…” Emotions crash into me out of nowhere, and my throat feels alarmingly tight. “Because I like to pretend it belongs to someone else.”
Why am I admitting this? I shouldn’t be admitting this.
“Why?”
I hold the blanket tighter, bringing it higher, so it’s covering half my mouth. “Does it matter?”
“Yes. Answer the question.”
I keep the blanket where it is. “Because it makes me feel like I have someone.”
His jaw works, before he pulls back, stretching up and up until he’s standing straight. “What about Dip Shit?”
“Who?” My eyes are locked on his chest muscles.
Chest. That sounds like a fake word.
“Leland.”
“Hmm? What about him?” I visually trace the pattern of his body hair as it goes down, and down, disappearing beneath the band of shiny blue boxers.
“Didn’t you have any of his clothes?”
“Have his clothes?” I shake my head against the pillow. “Why would I have his clothes?”
“Jesus Christ,” King mutters, and I finally bring my gaze back up to his. He points a finger to the closet. “If I go in there, and dig through your shit, am I going to find any of Leland’s clothes?”
I scrunch my nose, earlier sad emotions already forgotten. “That would be weird.”
“Why… You know what, never mind.” King heaves out a breath and I feel bad for making him upset.
“I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry about, Savannah?” he asks, resigned.
“Um, for…” I try to remember. “Making you mad?” I finish as a question.
“Alright, Honey.” King flips off his bedside lamp and in the following darkness, I feel his movements through the mattress.
Quiet follows, and I wait somewhere between a moment and forever before scooting over to his side of the bed.
Part of me knows it’s always been me, that I’m the one who moves every night, forcing him into cuddling with me. But I like it.
I shouldn’t.
Not with him.
But I do.
My nose bumps into his shoulder, and, without prompting, King lifts his arm.
With a satisfied exhale, I press my cheek against my favorite spot on his chest.
CHAPTER34
King
Fuck.Me.