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Lila nodded. Ann extracted herself from Lila’s embrace until she was standing. She dressed slowly, making sure to check in on Lila in the process, looking for any sign that she’d just ruined the good thing they had going. As soon as she was fully clothed, her jacket in place, Ann bent down and kissed Lila, lingering for as long as she felt comfortable.

“I’ll call you, okay?”

“Yeah.”

“And I promise I’ll make up for last weekend. Just give me a bit to get the details worked out.”

“Sure.” Lila kissed her quickly. “You better get going.”

“See you soon.” As Ann left, she knew she was off her game.

CHAPTER11

Two weeks since her breakdown,Heidi knew she was on better footing. She could at least take a shower without crying now. Ann was at work all day, and Heidi was home by herself, something that hadn’t happened in quite a few days. While quiet was unnerving, it was also comforting.

She curled onto her side in the blankets and covered her head with the comforter. She could spend all day there if she wasn’t careful, and she knew Ann would be worried if she did. She would have to find a reason to get up and function as much like a normal person as she could.

Her phone buzzed, distracting her from trying to formulate any plans. Heidi stared at it curiously before answering. “Hey there.”

“Heidi.”

“Yes?”

“Come over.”

Heidi turned on her back and stared at the ceiling. What was the universe putting her through? She nodded before she answered. “When?”

“Today. I’ve got nothing planned, and I could use some company.”

“It’s as if you’re reading my mind,” Heidi muttered. “Text me your address. I’ve got all day to kill.”

“Yes!” Lila laughed. “When will you be here?”

“Give me an hour.”

“Perfect. I’ll make breakfast.”

“See you soon.” Heidi dropped her phone onto the nightstand as soon as the conversation was over. Well, she had plans for the day. Now all she had to do was force her body to move so she could get out of bed and put herself together. It was far harder than convincing herself to go into work. Friends were more understanding of needed mental health days than bosses.

She was late, but it wasn’t much beyond the hour when Heidi pulled up outside of Lila’s apartment. It was on the near side of town, closer to where she drove to get home, so it was only a twenty-minute drive instead of thirty, otherwise she would have been really late. Heidi’s heart thumped so hard it hurt. She’d never taken advantage of their open relationship before. She’d never done anything like this, but she knew she wanted more than simple friendship with Lila.

Nerves swirled in her belly as she stared at the building in front of her. She could do this. She wanted it, and Ann would be fine with it. That wasn’t what worried her. It was opening her heart to someone else, to even begin to make that journey when she’d barely been able to make it with Ann, even after fifteen years together.

It took another two minutes before Heidi finally forced herself from the car. She moved slowly up the stairs as she looked for the right apartment number. It was right in front of her. Drawing in a deep breath, she let it out slowly and formed a fist as she knocked. Heidi shoved her hands in her pockets and stood awkwardly as she waited for Lila to answer.

When the door opened, she was smacked with a wall of heat from inside. She hadn’t even realized how cold it was outside. Lila’s bright blue eyes, rosy cheeks, beautifully wavy blonde hair all set her at ease and welcomed her. Her lips curled into a smile unbidden.

“Finally!” Lila opened the door to let Heidi in. “I was beginning to think you’d gotten lost.”

“No, just took a bit longer to get ready than I thought it would.” It was a small white lie, and as soon as Heidi stepped inside and the door was shut, she shook her head. She wasn’t going to do this. Not again. “Actually, no. I was nervous. I took my time because of that and then I sat in the parking lot outside for a good ten minutes before I managed to get the courage to come inside.”

Lila’s look softened, and she reached for Heidi’s hand, gripping her fingers. “Why so nervous? I don’t bite.”

Heidi flushed as the retort on her tongue was definitely not what she should say. “Because I’ve never done this before.”

“Done what?”

“Been out with someone.” Lila narrowed her gaze, and Heidi realized she was doing an awful job of explaining. “Been out with someone since we opened our relationship. I never found someone interesting.”