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Dad got up and swept some wood shavings from his pants. “A hotel for hamsters. People who go on vacation, often have trouble finding a place for their pets, at least when their pets are not the usual ones like cats and dogs. So we thought, why not open a hamster hotel?”

Why not? I could think of at least ten reasons off the top of my head.

“Why did you choose my room? Benji’s room has been empty for a couple of years.”

Mom and Dad exchanged looks. “We thought about it, but your room has a view of the garden. The hamsters will love that.”

“I don’t think hamsters care about a garden view,” I said.

Dad winked at me. “Maybe not, but their owners will. Just imagine how they’ll feel when they hear their hamster can stay in a themed room with a garden view. Pretty clever, huh?”

I looked in my parents’ eyes to check for any signs of drug use. This had to be a temporary bout of being high as a kite.

“Do you need me to call a doctor?” I asked in a careful tone.

Mom threw me a look that shut me up right away. “Stop it, Olive. This is not a joke. And we know exactly what we’re doing.”

“Why don’t you give her a tour of the room?” Dad asked Mom. “That’ll make her realize how awesome this is.”

Mom grabbed my arm, and we walked around my old bedroom together. “We’ll have all kinds of themes. This one is the Mermaid Room,” Mom said, pointing at a hamster cage filled with ocean-themed objects like ceramic shells, glass turtles, and paper seaweed. The bedding was purple and blue, and Mom assured me the coloring was safe for animals.

Next stop was the farm-themed cage, which Mom called the Barn Room. It looked like a miniature farm with ceramic cows and pigs, tiny hay bales, fences made of popsicle sticks, and faux vegetables. I had to admit their project looked impressive and unique, despite feeling sad my old room was no more.

“Do you already have guest bookings?” I asked after Mom showed me the cupcake-themed and forest-themed hamster cages.

She picked up a notebook from the windowsill and put it against her chest as if it were her most prized possession. “Hamlet, the hamster, is due to arrive this Sunday. His owners picked out the Barn Room for him. He’s going to have so much fun.”

Honestly, I still wasn’t convinced my parents weren’t tripping on mushrooms. Never in my twenty-five years of living with them had they talked about opening a hamster hotel, but if Mom said it was a life-long dream of hers, who was I to argue with that?

“It does look nice,” I said with a smile.

“That reminds me,” Dad said.

He crouched down on the floor and leafed through an old shoebox filled with envelopes. When he got up again, he handed me a blue one. “We’re having a launch party this Friday. You’ll be there, right?”

I studied the envelope before opening it. “Why does it say Olive and partner? You guys know I’m not seeing anyone at the moment.”

Mom and Dad exchanged a look. “We know,” Mom started. “But it would mean the world to us if you would bring someone along.”

“Who would I bring?”

Mom shrugged. “I don’t know, a nice guy. Someone you can have a good time with, maybe let it grow into something more.”

I slumped my shoulders. “I can’t find an amazing date on such short notice.”

“Aren’t there apps for that these days?” Mom asked. “What’s that popular one called… Finder?”

Dad pulled on her arm and led her away from me. Unfortunately, my old bedroom wasn’t that big, and I could hear every word they were saying.

“Colleen, I told you writing Olive and partner on that envelope was a bad idea.”

Mom glanced over her shoulder at me before returning her attention to Dad. “But she never brings anyone home. Never. We have to try, don’t we? At this rate, we’ll never have grandchildren.”

“Maybe she’s pandasexual,” Dad said with a shrug. “We should respect that.”

Mom shook her head. “It’s called pantssexual, Gary. And so what if she is? She can still have kids, you know.”

Why the obsession with me getting pregnant and producing grandkids?