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No.

He did not want to remember anything.

He shot up to his feet, but even as he stalked back to his house, he was unable to run away from the memories.

And it was just one memory really, one that always threatened to drive him to his knees.

Her lips, soft, warm, and trembling, pressing against his—-

Her voice, choking and pleading—-

“Please. Please tell me you’re...you’re just pretending? You’re just controlling yourself?”

Why the fuck couldn’t he forget it?

He worked fourteen hours each day, fucked a different woman every night, and never went to bed sober.

But he still couldn’t make himself forgether.

Serenity Raleigh.

The girl who had told him in not so many words that she loved him.

Willem squeezed his eyes shut as soon as the thought occurred to him, but it was too late.

“Sere?”He remembered deliberately calling her by his personal nickname because he had wanted to remind her, selfishly, of all the years they had been together.

But when he had, Serenity had looked at him like he was no longer the hero she thought he was, and it had made him furious.

“Do I really have to answer that?”He remembered how her voice threatened to crack at the very end, but he also remembered how he had allowed his self-righteous fury to bury his guilt for being so damn selfish.

“Do I really have to answer that?”Even then, Willem had known it had been a crass thing to say, but he had still said it. Because even then, he had realized that his fury wasn’t just to conceal his guilt. It was also there to conceal his fear, which was even more difficult to accept.

“T-then...I need you to stand up.”

And he had done it, even though the most risk-averse part of him had roared at Willem to get the hell out, to leave before his whole world spun off its axis.

“Now what?”

“C-come here.”

And like the self-righteous bastard he now knew himself to be, he had ignored everything his instincts were warning him against and had done what Serenity had asked.

He had come to her.

The reminder made him swear and rake his hand through his hair.Goddammit.What a smug bastard he had been. She was hisnineteen-year-old intern.He was herthirty-three-year-old boss.He was light years ahead of her in experience, and he had allowed her to command him just like that.

That should have been the only warning he had needed.

But he had chosen to play deaf, and he was now paying the price.

Willem’s fists slammed down on the handrail. “Damn you.”The words were torn out of him, but he wasn’t certain if he was cursing Serenity, himself, or Fate.

All he knew was that nothing was working.

He could not forget her, and fair or not, right or wrong, Willem despised Serenity for it.

He had already allowed himself to be weak once, out of his love for his family.