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“You think it has something to do with Penelope?”

His grandfather smiled. “I am certain it has everything to do with her, my boy. Love can change a man.”

“Love?” James echoed, getting up and shaking his head. “No, no, no. This isn’t love, Grandfather. Most certainly not.”

His grandfather frowned in confusion. “Then what is it?

James gestured with his hands as he spoke as he always did when he was slightly nervous. “I am merely trying to make her more comfortable. She was in a convent mere days before our wedding, Grandfather, so the siring of an heir is intimidating for her. She needs time to adjust. I do not want to make it traumatizing for her, so we’re taking it one step at a time.”

He did his best to focus on the business side of their deal although nothing of what he had done recently for Penelope was business related. He enjoyed every single moment spent with Penelope, and that was exactly what was frightening him to such an extent.

His grandfather thought about it for a moment then he reminded James of something he himself knew well. “Before, you wouldn’t have reacted in this manner at all. You would not have taken the time to make her comfortable, or you would have simply asked for an annulment so you could find a new wife altogether.”

James mused on his grandfather’s words. He had to admit that the man was right. And thatpetrifiedhim.

“So, you see, my boy,” Grandfather continued, seeing that James had nothing to say, “bestowing so much attention upon your wife is not just a means to an end, as you have put it. There is something deeper to it, something you refuse to admit. It is all right when you refuse to admit a certain truth to others, but when you are lying to yourself, that cannot end well.”

“I am not lying to anyone, Grandfather,” James spoke in a determined tone of voice although he was anything but. “I just told you, I am merely trying to court my wife as customs dictate. We didn’t have that courtship period, so this has to be it. I cannot expect her to provide me with an heir just because I tell her to.”

His grandfather chuckled. “At least you are aware ofthat.”

Upon those words, he got up from his chair. “Well, I shan’t be taking any more of your time. You go on and try to focus, my boy. I shall go see what that lovely wife of yours is doing and see if she will join me for a cup of tea. If you have any wits about you, you will join us.”

“No, I’ve got a ton of work here,” James pointed at the piles and piles of papers lying on his writing table.

“But you said you couldn’t focus,” his grandfather reminded him.

“I can’t, but I have to try,” James replied. “Someone has to take care of the family business, and I am the one whose burden it has become ever since?—”

He cut himself short, not wanting to continue. His grandfather walked over to him, patting him tenderly on the shoulder.

“You’ve always been so hard on yourself. Too hard,” he spoke gently and with much love. “You keep forgetting that it is all right to be happy. You do not have to grieve them forever, you know.”

“I know, Grandfather,” James nodded.

He waited until he was all alone then he slumped back into his chair. Ever since his family died at the hands of his father, emotions were a strange, unfamiliar land to him. Whatever those emotions were, he knew that he couldn’t give into them. He couldn’t risk becoming his father.

You will never be like your father,his grandfather’s words rang inside his mind like a broken church bell. But were they true?

James couldn’t be sure, and he refused to risk it because risking it meant putting Penelope’s life in danger. His father’s blood streamed through his veins. What if that madness lay dormant inside of him, kept at bay solely because he refused to open his heart to anyone?

No. He couldn’t risk it. He wouldn’t. That was why there was only one thing left to do, no matter how difficult it was. He would do it if it meant keeping Penelope safe from harm.

CHAPTER24

When Penelope woke up the following morning, everything seemed right. Her heart swelled with anticipation, for each of the previous three days, James had a surprise planned out for them. She smiled as she noticed another bouquet of fresh flowers adorning her bedside table, their colors as vibrant as ever. With a flutter of excitement, she wondered what other treasures the day might hold.

She called for Charlotte and got dressed quickly with their usual cheerful chatter as the welcome of a new day. She rushed down the stairs, right into the dining hall, where Grandfather was already seated with his usual morning, fortified tea.

“Ah, Penelope, my dear, you are here,” he greeted, getting up ad walking over to her to kiss her hand reverently.

There was, of course, no need for that as they lived under the same roof, but he had taken it upon himself to do each and every morning, and it had become a sweet little routine they shared which brought them even closer together.

“Grandfather, good morning,” she chirped back at him, gazing at the table, already prepared with breakfast delights. “What shall we partake in this morning?”

“Toast and jam, of course!” he giggled.

“Toast and jam it is,” she smiled back, taking a seat.