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He growled, low in his throat, his forehead pressed to mine as he inhaled through his nose. “It’s too bad I can’t…take you in this cave.”

He kissed me again, softer, slower. It was a kiss full of intention, of promise. It made me wish he would take me right there on that rock.

“What’s the problem?” I teased. “Can’t work without a bed?”

He grinned, a wicked glint in his eyes. “Mmmmm.” He inhaled again and shook his head. “I don’t need a bed for all the things I plan to do to you, partner.” He shifted me on his lap so we could lay down together. Back settled against the rock, Rhyan tucked me into his arms.

“Care to elaborate?” I asked, stroking his hair as I snuggled closer to him.

He kissed my cheek, my jaw, my neck, each kiss more tender than the last. “If we had all night here, maybe. But I am not going to rush through our first time, nor am I prepared to let you leave my arms right after. I’m going to need hours, days, weeks to bed you properly.” His kisses returned to the corner of my mouth before he slanted his lips over mine.

“And what exactly are you going to do during that time?” I asked, voice low.

He grinned, pulling me closer, his arms like a metal cage around me, his lips against my ear. “Show you the real meaning of stamina, not speed.”

I shivered, feeling heat flame through my body. “Promise?”

“On my soul.” He swallowed, his hand threading through mine, his expression serious. “And on that note...I don’t know if the akadim attack tonight will change anything, but assuming your test tomorrow is still on, I need to say something.”

I squeezed his hand.

He pressed his forehead to mine again, his hand wrapped around the nape of my neck, his thumb stroking up and down. “I am so fucking proud of you. All the work you’ve done, all your training. You are a warrior. Magic or not, I trust in your strength.”

“Thank you,” I said. And seeing how serious he looked, I added, “But?”

He sighed. “But I don’t trust the Emperor or the Imperator. Tomorrow, if things go awry, know that it has nothing to do with your strength or your skill. There are a fair number of soturi I could list right now who I believe you’d take easily in a fight. But we know they won’t play fair. So, if it comes down to it, your life or mine—”

“Rhyan, no.”

“If they play dirty tomorrow, if they have you cornered, I will be in that arena before you can blink. And we’ll be gone.”

I caressed his cheek, catching a tear. I dried it with my thumb and kissed his eyelid, and then his scar, only realizing then my own tears were starting to fall.

“I won’t lose you,” he said. “Of all the oaths I swore, this one I will hold. I will keep you safe.”

I nodded. “Any more confessions?”

“I think we’ve reached our quota for the night,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut. We lay like that, silent, cocooned in our own little world of the cave, watching the fiery shadows on the wall, both aware of the horrors we’d left behind and the mess we were minutes from returning to. At last, Rhyan sat up, stretching his neck from side to side.

“I’m going to take you back to just outside the fortress walls. I think, we should be safe. Enough time has passed that you could be believably hiding.”

He was right. If we’d hidden from the threat and traveled back to Cresthaven by foot, we’d only be arriving just now. Plus—I exhaled sharply as reality began to sink in—I’d made a deal with Mercurial. And by his own show of good will, we still had another hour or so of being safe, of being free from suspicion if anyone saw us.

I didn’t have my soturion cloak, so I wound my arms around Rhyan’s neck as he wrapped the edge of his cloak around me.

“Ready, partner?” he asked.

I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to leave the warmth of the cave, not wanting to leave the warmth of this moment, and our confession. Knowing the moment we traveled, I’d be pulled from his arms, back into reality, back into the horrors of the night and our duties. But it was time. My stomach twisted as the tinkling water sounds of the nearby pool, and the final hiss of the extinguished torchlights vanished.

My feet touched down on the cold ground. Rhyan breathed in the scent of my hair, and then we separated. He paled, the traveling immediately catching up to him. He’d only just gotten some of his energy back. I reached for him, wrapping my arms around his waist as he leaned his head on my shoulder, catching his breath. I supported his weight for several minutes. We were just outside the wall of Cresthaven—a spot behind a tree where we were unlikely to be discovered.

I rubbed his back, so grateful to him, and wishing so desperately once more that I could give my own strength to him. But soon his breathing deepened, and he started to straighten. I kept my hand on the small of his back until I was sure he was steady. With a nod of his head, assuring me he could continue, I stepped away and we approached the fortress walls.

We were immediately let inside. The moment I touched the waterway path, I ran, racing to get inside, to see my sisters, to make sure everyone was alive and unharmed.

But when Euston and Rhodes opened the doors for me, they didn’t greet me. Their faces were long and grim, and I found chaos inside the Great Hall. Auras full of fear and grief and anger were biting back and forth across the hall, so heavy and intense I felt I was sinking into the ocean.

“Your grace,” Eathan shouted, racing through the crowd to get to me. “Thank the Gods.” He pulled me into a tight hug, and my stomach turned as I saw that many of the Bamarian nobility were here, huddled in small groups, many openly crying. Some shouting. A mage stood a few feet away from me in shock. Tears filled her eyes but she stood completely still, staring at nothing.