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Henrik’s eyes flash. “I have no right to be.”

“I didn’t ask you if you have a right.” I pause, my gaze locking on his. “I asked if youare.”

The air practically crackles between us, charged with this growing affection we can no longer ignore. It’s too big, too consuming.

Henrik’s internal struggle plays over his face—he wants me as much as I want him. But there are so many perfectly good reasons we shouldn’t…

And not one reason we should.

If we pursue this, we will have minutes instead of a lifetime. We’d leave the boat with memories of stolen kisses in a galley, laced with lingering longing and regret. Our willpower would be bruised, and we’d be forced to admit our self-control was lacking.

And what would we gain? We’d be in the same place we’ve been since we met—destined for different lives.

But I can’t bring myself to care. Right now, I want this man to kiss me. I want to know what it feels like to want and be wanted this desperately, and I want to relive the kiss in my dreams for the rest of my life.

But the moment I decide to make the reckless leap, Henrik regains control. I sag with disappointment when he releases me, his fingers trailing over my sides as if they’re reluctant to drop. We stare at each other, silently acknowledging how close we came.

It feels like we’re in a strange war, even though both of us want the same thing. Sometimes Henrik has more control; sometimes I do. And the moment it feels like one of us begins to slip, the other puts a stop to it.

As I’m pondering this inconvenient vein of responsibility we share, Henrik’s expression changes. His frustration gives way to a mirthless smirk. “I’ve come to terms with something.”

“And what’s that?” I ask, not sure I want to hear his answer.

“This must end.” He tries to make his tone teasing, but his voice is too low, and there’s an agitated bite to it. “If I were to kiss you, I’d set the bar too high. Lawrence could never live up to your unattainable expectations, and you’d live in disappointment your entire life.”

It’s supposed to be a joke, but the truth of it worries me. Still, I turn away, laughing even though he deserves to be tossed back into the bog for uttering such nonsense.

I’m about to step out the door for much-needed fresh air when Henrik suddenly asks, “Would you give up a crown for me, Clover?”

I come to a dead stop, not sure I heard him right. My breath suddenly comes too quickly. I don’t turn back to face him—I can’t.

“What?” I breathe.

In a tone that says he’s no longer playing, Henrik says, “I’m asking how much you’d risk for us—do you want this more than anything else?”

21

Clover

Slowly,I turn. Terrified, I meet his eyes. “What are you saying?”

Henrik crosses the room, his face solemn as his eyes search mine. “No more playing, Clover. I need to know where we stand. Would you give up a crown for a chance to be with the nobody son of a blacksmith? Do you want to see where this leads, even if you’ll have to give up your family when they refuse to offer us their blessing down the road? Could you live in a cottage in a little village as a poor housewife while I eke out a living making horseshoes?”

I stare at Henrik, and my heart pinches.

Softly, he finishes, “Are you willing to risk everything to see if this might be the love you spoke about?”

The air whooshes out of my lungs. I turn my eyes to the floor, staring at the grain in the wood. I don’t even have to think about it.

Quietly, I say, “No.”

Because if my answer is yes, I’ve as good as stolen Henrik’s seal, along with the future he so desperately wants for his sister.

His goals, his dreams, his entire life.

“I couldn’t do that to you.” I look up, hoping Henrik will understand that it’s not because I don’t care for him. “You’ve worked too hard to have it all be for naught.”

Henrik closes the distance between us and gently sets his hands on my shoulders. “I don’t want it for you either—I want you to have everything you’ve ever wanted out of life. But if we cross this line, I don’t think I could let you go.” He offers me a sad smile. “It’s already going to be impossibly difficult.”