Page 15

“Can we talk?” I ask.

She walks closer to me and I see the sweat that beads on her forehead and her upper lip. “Is everything okay?” she asks.

There’s a strange formality that exists between the two of us now that wasn’t there before. I suppose it’s better than outright hostility or anger, but it feels disingenuous all the same.

“Yes, everything’s as okay as it can be, given the circumstances, I suppose,” I say as we start away from the mercenaries and the tents.

“What’s on your mind, Cambion?” she asks.

I look over at her and inhale deeply, not appreciating the heat of the air that enters my lungs. In the fae realm, the air is much lighter, cooler and entirely more comfortable. The heat in this place is nearly unbearable. “I need you to know the truth,” I start.

She smiles up at me. “Haven’t we already had this conversation?”

“No,” I answer.

We move to a bit of shade to escape the sun. She leans against the wall, and I watch a bead of sweat trickle down her neck and get lost in the crease of her ample breasts. I lick my lips without thinking and lose myself in her blue eyes.

“Okay,” she says, “What truth do I need to know?”

“You always thought I didn’t desire you,” I start. “But I’ve wanted you from the moment I saw you. I just had to fight my feelings because I didn’t want you to learn the truth about who was responsible for your family and I didn’t want you to find out I’d lied.”

She frowns at me. “I’m sorry if I find that hard to believe,” she says. “One thing of which you’ve been strict about is your disinterest in me.”

“It was all a lie, Eilish.”

She nods but doesn’t appear convinced. “You treated me like I was less than a person,” she starts and I see the anger in her eyes. “Then you erased my memories when you failed to protect my family… a subject which I still don’t have all the details for.”

“I’m willing to explain what happened and why I didn’t uphold my end of our agreement,” I start but she silences me when she holds up one hand.

“I’m not ready to hear that just yet,” she says. “I’m still working through the details of everything I’ve come to learn just recently. And with Morrigan and Variant to worry about, I don’t think there’s much more my brain can handle.” She takes a breath. “So, if you don’t mind, can you keep that information to yourself for now?”

“Of course,” I answer with a nod. “Whenever you’re ready to hear what happened, please come to me and I will explain it all.”

“Okay,” she says. “So going back to the conversation we were just having… in all the time I’ve known you, you’ve done nothing but treat me as if I’m the bane of your existence...”

“I know,” I say and nod. “I can’t deny any of it. It’s all true.”

“Why would you treat me like that?”

“Because I wanted to push you away for the reasons I already mentioned and, more than that, I was jealous.”

“Of what?”

“Dragan and Baron—of the way you got along with them so easily. The way they obviously and openly cared for you. I always wanted that… but I didn’t understand how to get it. Not when I was hiding these horrible secrets from you.”

“I know I should be angry with you and Iamangry, but I care for you.” She pauses. “I always have.”

I reach down and take her hands, closing the gap between us. She doesn’t fight me so I move closer. Pressing my forehead against hers, I breathe in the scent of her. “I care for you, too, Eilish. I was wrong for what I did and how I treated you. And I don’t expect your forgiveness. But the truth is I do care for you.” I take a deep breath. “And what’s more, I know you need me.”

“Need you?” she repeats.

“The light in you is dwindling,” I explain. “We can all see it happening. The darkness is taking over and the angel within you is suffering.”

“Yes,” she says and nods as she glances down at the ground and I see the black tendrils of her hair. Last I had seen her there were just a few strands but that number has increased to double, at least.

“I want to help you,” I say as I reach down and grip her chin, lifting her beautiful face so she’s forced to look at me. “Do you remember… do you remember what it was like between us?”

“No,” she answers. “I mean, I get snips of visions here and there of the two of us but I can’t recall the memories, themselves.” She grows quiet for a few moments as she looks up at me. “Did we just have sex one time?”