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Grayson’s smile though was fragile. “Yeah, I haven’t felt that in a really long time. The last time I did was when I really didn’t know what it was like to be other.”

“You’re not other here,” Ryder said firmly.

“No, no, I’m not!” Grayson’s laughter was relieved and shocked sounding. “No, I’m totally not. And it’s amazing. But I don’t trust it. I’m terrified of this. Of this belonging, of this possibility of not living in fear all the time…”

Ryder saw Grayson’s shoulders lift and relax. Grayson had learned hard lessons from those on the street that were desperate or just cruel. He was seeing a way to let down his guard a little bit. To feel a part of something.

I shouldn’t have come up. I should have just walked him to the door.

Ryder glanced back up. Grayson was smiling faintly again. “I don’t intend to hurt you, Grayson.”

“But you might?” Grayson’s eyebrows lifted again.

“No. No, I won’t.” Ryder shook his head. He most definitely would not. He truly was here to keep Grayson safe. Yet he was also seeing that being alone with him, drinking wine, had nothing to do with that. “But I was not as clear with myself about my intentions for coming up here. Now that I do, in fact, know that the dorms are spelled against Vampires, the smart thing to do would be for me to return to the Weryn and ensure that Lawson leaves tomorrow.”

“Yeah, yeah, I could see that. That would be smart. And I should get some sleep because today--is it still today?--has been incredibly long,” Grayson agreed with him.

Ryder’s shoulders slumped. “Yes, that would be best.”

“Except that I didn’t ask you up here only to have you leave,” Grayson said. “And I’m really, really not ready to just let go of you.”

Ryder’s gaze swung up to Grayson’s beautiful face, confused. “What are you saying?”

“I asked you up here because I can’t stop imagining what it would be like to kiss you,” Grayson said and swallowed.

“Kiss me?” Ryder’s eyes hooded.

“Yeah, kiss you. And I can picture how it would be to have you curled around me when I sleep.” Grayson smiled.

Ryder could picture that, too. The warmth of Grayson’s naked body pressed against his own. The smell of his blood and cum and sweat and… Ryder’s cock ached as much as his fangs.

“I wonder what it would be like not to have to hold back with someone. So if you wake up and I’m floating… Well, no big deal, right?” Grayson said with a twist of a grin. “I sort of thought you wanted that too. Maybe not the floating part.”

Ryder blinked slowly. “So you brought me up here to--”

“Ravish you. Yep, that’s about it,” Grayson told him and took another swallow of wine. “Even though it’s a bad idea. Every instinct I have is telling me I should find an anonymous stranger to fuck and burn it out of my system--”

“Who?!” That came out almost like a snarl. Ryder had a feeling his eyes were glowing and his fangs were out. “Caemorn?!”

Grayson though did not look alarmed, but instead blinked. “Caemorn? Kaly? Uhm, he’s handsome, for sure.”

“You want him?” Ryder was suddenly pressed up against Grayson’s front as if to physically speak to him that he wanted no one else. Certainly not Kaly!

Grayson’s mouth quirked into a real smile. “No. He’s not my type. You’re my type. But I…”

“But what?” Ryder’s voice was softer now. There was not a threat from another.

“But I like you.”

It was Ryder’s turn to blink. “And this is a problem?”

“I don’t know. This place makes me want to take risks. Just let it all hang out and not care what the consequences are,” Grayson admitted. “I’ve never just let go. I’ve never wanted to.”

Ryder feathered one hand through Grayson’s hair. “If you wish me to go, all you need to do is say it. I will go.”

“I’m not afraid of you,” Grayson said as he reached up and curled an arm around Ryder. “I’m afraid of… well, it doesn’t matter, because I want this more. So much more.” But then Grayson finished his glass and grabbed the neck of the bottle. “But if you must go off and be all noble and deal with your Vampire politics, I understand. I will go finish this bottle of wine and jerk off in the--”

Grayson did not get to finish that sentence. Ryder had swooped in and covered that mouth with his own. The kiss was deep and wine-soaked. He chased the taste of the Spectre along Grayson’s palate. The wine had never tasted so good.