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I moved up and kissed him again. He tasted like sweat and salt and morning. My body pressed against his, both of usalready hard, friction building between us like static. I reached into the drawer without looking, fingers closing around the bottle of lube we kept stashed there. The sound of the cap snapping open cut through the quiet, sharp and familiar.

Sean’s breath caught.

“You okay?” I asked, softer now.

He nodded, but I held his gaze until I was sure. Then I slicked up my fingers and reached between his thighs, circling his hole slowly, watching the way he reacted. He gasped, hands grabbing at my shoulders.

“Relax,” I murmured. “I got you.”

I worked one finger in, slow and careful. Then another. His body clenched around me, breath hitching, but he didn’t tell me to stop. If anything, he rocked his hips down, chasing the sensation.

“You’re full of surprises,” he muttered through gritted teeth.

I leaned in close. “Yeah?”

“Didn’t think you’d be the one topping.”

“Guess we’re both learning shit today.”

I added more lube, fingers working him open until he was squirming, whispering curses and half-formed words. When I pulled away, he looked at me like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to kiss me or kill me.

I slicked up my cock and lined up, pressing in slow. Sean’s head fell back, eyes fluttering shut, jaw tight. I gave him time, rubbing his thigh, whispering, “Breathe. Just like that.”

When I bottomed out, we both stilled. The heat of him wrapped around me, tight and perfect, nearly took me out. I had to grip the sheets to keep from moving too fast.

“More,” Sean rasped.

“You sure?”

“Don’t make me beg, Cross.”

So I gave him more. A slow thrust, then another. Letting it build, keeping it steady until he was gasping, nails dragging down my back. When I shifted his legs higher and hit just right, he moaned so loud I was sure the neighbors would hear.

“Fuck,” he muttered. “Right there.”

I gave it to him rougher then, pace picking up, our bodies slamming together in a rhythm that felt carved into my bones. I watched his face, the way he fell apart beneath me. His eyes locked on mine, filled with too much—want, need, maybe even love. I couldn’t let myself look too closely at that. Not yet.

I leaned down and kissed him hard, swallowing the sounds he made, chasing the heat curling in my gut. When he reached between us to stroke himself, I grabbed his wrist and pinned it above his head.

“I said I got you,” I growled.

He shuddered. “Then fucking take it.”

I did.

We were a mess of sweat and skin and sound, bodies grinding, hands gripping, mouths bruising. I didn’t hold back. Didn’t pretend this was gentle anymore. He didn’t want gentle. Not now. I thrust harder, faster, until the bed creaked and Sean was gasping my name like a prayer gone hoarse.

I wanted to feel what Sean was giving me. But there was still that hollow space where my emotions should be. So I gave him my body instead, let my actions speak what my heart couldn't access. Maybe if I went through the motions long enough, the feelings would follow.

He came first, all over his stomach, shaking beneath me. I chased my own release after that, slamming into him with a final few thrusts before coming deep inside him, groaning low against his throat.

We stayed tangled together after, hearts racing, breath uneven. I didn’t move for a long time. Couldn’t. My body was exhausted, but it was more than that.

Sean’s hand found mine and squeezed. “You okay?”

I didn’t answer right away. My face was buried in his neck, trying to hold on to the feeling before the world came back.

“Yeah,” I finally said. “Just… yeah.”