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“Yeah, first and last time for that option. I still can’t drink the stuff.”
She smiled at him, stepped up. “Do you love Tia?”
He drew in a breath and then, “Yes. I think... Yes. But it’s different than Juliet. With Juliet it felt almost like... okay, I guesspanicis the right word. Or even like someday it was all going to blow up in my face. I loved her so much that...”
“You lost yourself.”
He frowned.
“First love can do that. It takes over and you suddenly can’t see beyond right now.”
“We had a future planned. And then I had nothing. There was no future without Juliet.”
“But see, there was. Thereis. And that’s what’s been so hard to get into your head. You don’t want to imagine a future without her.”
He stared at her.Maybe.
“And that’s why you’ve been stuck.”
“I’ve been waiting for God to show up, tell me what to do. And for a short bit there, I thought... I thought Tia might be the answer.”
“Tia might be part of your future, but she is not the answer to God’s will for your life, Doyle. Peace is God’s will for your life. Joy is God’s will for your life. Love is God’s will for your life.”
She grabbed his hand, held it. “God might have changed the plan, according to your vision, but he never changed his will. He wills that you find joy in your every day, despite sorrow, and that you know his deep and abiding love for you, even in grief. And that comes only from a yes to God’s invitation to follow Him, even if you don’t know where you’ll end up. Or with whom. You do have a future. You just have to have the courage to hold on to God and let Him show it to you.”
She stepped up, kissed his cheek, put her arms around him. “Tia is not the replacement for God’s will. But she might be a byproduct of it. Your heart is making room for someone new.”
She let him go. “‘The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; hismerciesnever come to an end; they arenew every morning.’ Go to bed, Doyle. Tomorrow is a fresh start.”
Declan had come out into the courtyard wearing a raincoat, holding keys to one of the vehicles. “Hamilton has set up watches with his guys. Everything is secure. Ready, Austen?”
And again, the warmth in the way Declan looked at Austen, put his hand out as if to settle it on the small of her back...
“Something going on between you two?”
Austen raised an eyebrow. Declan dropped his hand. “No.” He patted Doyle on the shoulder. “You’re the right guy for this job, Doyle. Thanks.” He winked and headed out, holding the door open for Austen.
So maybe he was just a gentleman.
Doyle headed upstairs to the balcony, and then he couldn’t stop himself from walking down to Tia’s room.
He stood in front of her door, his fists tight. He should knock. Apologize. Because the idea of waiting until tomorrow knotted his gut.
“Tomorrow is a fresh start.”
Yes it was.And frankly, if Tia did open the door, did invite him in, did accept his apology...
He was tired and maybe a little broken, and he saw himself kissing her again, and...
Okay then. He walked to his room, went inside, pulled off his rain gear, and headed to a hot shower.
He fell like a rock into bed, closed his eyes, and sleep took him, despite Tia’s horrified gaze in his head.
Sorry, Tia.
But maybe, terribly, Juliet did own a part of his brain, because even as he slept, she walked into his dreams and sat down on the bed.
He was sleeping, right?