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Thirteen

“Nope, not doing it,” I said, when Emma’s alarm rang a few hours later. I could do one night without sleep, but not two. It just wasn’t going to happen. This was my second-to-last day and I was calling out sick. I’d have to go in the next day to clean out my desk and get my shit from the kitchen, so I was going to spend today sleeping.

“How did Vegas get in here?” A sleepy voice next to me asked. I turned my head to find a rumpled Emma blinking at me. Vegas was still here and he yawned and stretched before bounding all over the bed and licking both of our faces.

“I taught him how to open doors,” I said, through a yawn. I felt like complete and utter shit. I did not want to be awake right now, but I’d needed that time last night to work through my shit and think about my future and what I wanted it to look like.

“Did you get up and let him in? We really shouldn’t let him sleep in our bed,” she said, but she was smiling as she scratched his ears.

“You know that you’re going to lose that battle, Em.” The blankets slid down and revealed her incredible boobs and I had to catch my breath. If I decided I wanted to be with her, I’d get to see her boobs. All the time. Every day.

“You’re staring,” she said, putting her finger under my chin and raising my chin.

“I can’t help it. I’ve never seen your boobs this early in the morning.” I’d never gotten to see Emma naked this early in the morning. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

“Okay, let’s do it,” I said, opening them.

“Do what?” Emma said, looking up from playing with Vegas.

“Let’s be together.” She seemed confused for a second.

“Do you love me?”

“I think so,” I said, and instead of being overjoyed, she frowned.

“That’s not good enough. I only want to be with you if you know you want to be with me, beyond a doubt. I won’t accept anything less.” I opened my mouth to argue with her, but then I shut it with a snap. She was right. I couldn’t do this halfway. When the hell had I done anything halfway? Now wasn’t the time to start, and definitely not when it came to love.

“Okay. I’ll let you know when I know for sure. But until then, can we keep doing this?” She turned on her side and smiled.

“Can you be more specific?”

“This,” I said, kissing her. “This.” I squeezed one of her boobs and she yelped. “This.” I stroked her between her legs and she made another noise altogether. “All of this.” I stroked her again and she pushed into my hand. I was definitely awake now. Funny how sex could do that.

“I need to go to class,” she said, but she wasn’t stopping me at all.

“I mean, I haven’t slept in two days and I’m definitely calling out of work. Speaking of that,” I grabbed my phone, which had been charging on the nightstand and sent out a text to anyone who needed to know at my job that I wouldn’t be in. I was sure Maggie would be upset that she couldn’t soak up more of my wisdom, but that enthusiasm was going to get sucked out of her in four to six months, guaranteed. Poor thing. So young, so un-jaded.