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“I’ve tried using my shadows,” Arabella said. “But it’s made no difference.”

Hadeon had said the map was made by Prince Arden, and only other shadow fae could read it. She still found it strange that Hadeon had been friends with someone who’d been alive six hundred years ago—someone who was merely a name in a history book to her.

Someone who may be related to her.

That connection apparently didn’t matter as far as the map was concerned. No matter what she’d tried for the past several hours, the map remained unhelpfully blank.

Jessamine nodded before turning her gaze toward the horizon and the Twilight Court. “I never thought I’d see the fae lands.” Her voice no longer held the edge it had moments before. “I figured I’d remain in Shadowbank until the day a demon bested me.”

“Until Elias took me to the Twilight Court for the queen’s ball, I’d thought the same for myself.” Arabella reached out, clasping Jessamine’s hand. Calloused fingers gripped hers in return. “It’s so much more peaceful than Shadowbank.”

A sudden sadness swelled in her chest.

“None of it’s fair.” Jessamine’s voice caught for a moment. “The fae leave us to die at the hands of demons when they have so much power. Even the land, itself, is more powerful here. They could wipe out the lesser demons that attack Shadowbank with a mere thought, and they don’t. You saw how powerful Hadeon was. He might even be able to kill a greater demon single-handedly.” For a long moment, all was silent. Then Jessamine said, “It makes me hate them—the fae. To have that much power and not use it to help those who need it is despicable.”

Arabella took a deep breath. “Part of me is disgusted with them, too. But after meeting the queen, another part of me wonders just how much most of the fae know about the mortal realm.”

Jessamine sniffed. “It’s on them to learn. They shouldn’t wait for their leaders to spoon-feed them—whether it’s truth or lies.”

“Perhaps they’re no different from humans,” Arabella said. “Perhaps they’re only concerned for the welfare of those they care about. And everything else is irrelevant.”

Jessamine turned to her, a hardness returning to her eyes before reluctant understanding filled them. They’d both been forced to make hard decisions in Shadowbank—deciding who to protect when there weren’t enough resources to protect everyone.

Sighing, Jessamine said, “So much has changed in a short amount of time.”

“Yes,” Arabella agreed. “It has.”

“How do you feel about trying to find the shadow fae?” Jessamine asked. “Do you think Hadeon spoke the truth about your mother?”

Shrugging, Arabella allowed her gaze to return to the dark castle. For a moment, she thought she spotted shapes flying to and from the highest turrets. But that wasn’t possible. Only a fae could see that far. Unless…

Unless there was a kernel of truth in Hadeon’s claims that she was shadow fae.

“I think Hadeon is a scheming bastard,” Arabella said. “But… I don’t think he's dishonest. I believe he’s convinced himself of my lineage—whether it’s true or not.”

“Big claim and no evidence.” Jessamine’s grip on Arabella’s hand tightened slightly. “Would you want to meet them if they’re still alive?”

Arabella shrugged. “I’ve never cared about where I came from before. They might have birthed me, but they didn’t raise me. But if they happened to be in the Abyss, I’d speak to them. I have a lot of questions about my magic. My shadows are changing.”

“How?”

“It’s difficult to explain.” Arabella shook her head, struggling to find the words. “It’s harder to control them now. They respond to my fear and anger, almost like they feel my emotions.”

“I hate to say it, but I think we could use the shadow fae’s help—if they’re alive,” Jessamine said. “When we were at the castle with Breckett, you seemed different.”

“I can feel myself changing,” Arabella admitted.

“I wonder how much of it is the mating bond versus your magic,” Jessamine said. “Maybe it’s something else we aren’t thinking of.” She snickered. “Or this could just be the new badass Arabella.”

Arabella laughed, though her heart wasn’t fully in it. “Maybe.”

There was so much out of their control.

Her magic, the army, and a sorcerer who wanted her for reasons she didn’t yet know. Not to mention the possibility of her fae lineage, Shadowbank’s patchwork ward, and no way to rescue her mate.

Restlessness filled her limbs, making it hard to remain in one place. She felt guilty allowing herself any pleasure or respite when there was so much that needed doing.

Her gaze strayed to the scroll in her lap. They’d leave for the gateway in the morning. And if they had any hope of finding the shadow fae and returning, she had to be able to read this map.