Page 53
Story: Darkest Hour (Cutler 5)
I turned, threw my books on the table in the hallway, and ran out of the house. I got to Henry's quarters as quickly as I could and knocked on his door.
"Why hello there, Miss Lillian," Henry said, beaming a wide smile as if nothing at all was wrong. I looked past him and saw he had tied up his clothes in a bundle and had filled an old and tattered brown leather suitcase with everything else he owned. He had rope where the suitcase's straps used to be.
"Tottie just told me what Papa has done, Henry. You can't go. I'm going to beg him to let you stay," I moaned. My eyes were filling with tears so quickly, I thought my face would be drenched.
"Oh no, Miss Lillian. You can't do that. Times are hard here and the Captain, he ain't got much choice," Henry said, but I could see the pain in his face. He loved The Meadows as much as Papa did. Even more, I thought, for Henry's sweat and blood was in this plantation.
"Who'll take care of us and provide our food and . . ."
"Oh, Mr. Slope will do just fine when it comes to those chores, Miss Lillian. Don't fret none."
"I'm not worried about ourselves, Henry. I don't want anyone else doing those things. You can't go. First, Louella retires and now you are sent away. How can Papa fire you? You're as much a part of The Meadows as . . . as he is. I won't let him send you away. I won't. Don't pack another thing!" I cried, and ran toward the house before Henry could change my mind.
Papa was in his office, behind his desk, bent over his papers. Beside him was a glass of bourbon. When I entered, he didn't look up until I was practically at his desk.
"What is it now, Lillian?" he demanded as if I were pulling on his coattails with requests and questions all day. He sat up and tugged on the ends of his mustache, his dark eyes scanning me critically. "I don't want to hear another tale about your mother, if
that's it."
"No, Papa. I. . ."
"Well then, what is it? You can see I'm tormenting over these damn bills."
"It's about Henry, Papa. We can't let him go, we just can't. Henry loves The Meadows. He belongs here forever," I pleaded.
"Forever," Papa spat as if I had spoken a curse word. He gazed out the window for a moment and then he sat forward. "This here plantation is still a working farm, a money-making enterprise, a business. Do you know what that means, Lillian? That means you put costs and expenses on one side and profits on the other, see," he said, tapping on his papers with his long right forefinger. "And then you subtract the profits by the costs and expenses periodically and see what you have and what you don't and we don't have a quarter of what we had a year ago this time. Not a quarter!" he cried, his eyes wide and raging at me as if it was my fault.
"But Papa, Henry . . ."
"Henry's an employee, just like anyone else, and just like anyone else, he's got to pull his load or go. The fact is," Papa said in a calmer tone, "Henry is way past his prime, way past the age when he should be retired and sitting on a back porch someplace smoking a corncob pipe and remembering his youth," Papa said, a hint of wistfulness in his voice. "I kept him on as long as I could, but even his small wages contribute to the bottom line and I can't afford to waste a penny these days."
"But Henry does his work, Papa. He always did."
"I got a new, young man to do all that work and he costs me plenty, but he's worth it. Now it would be business-stupid to keep Henry on just to tag along and stand behind Charles whenever he's doing something, wouldn't it? You're a smart enough girl to see that, Lillian. And besides, nothing makes a man want to just lay down and die as much as knowing he's worthless, and that's what Henry's got to face every day as long as he's here.
"So," he said, sitting back, contented with his logic, "in a way I'm doing him a big favor by letting him go." "But where will he go, Papa?"
"Oh, he's got a nephew lives in Richmond," Papa said.
"Henry won't like living in a city," I muttered.
"Lillian, I can't worry about that now, can I? The Meadows, that's what I got to worry about and that's what you should be worrying about too. Now go on, get out of here and do whatever it is you do this time of day," he said, dismissing me with a wave of his hand and then bending over his papers again. I stood there for a moment and then left slowly.
Although it was bright and sunny outside, it looked gray and dismal when I stepped out of the house and walked toward Henry's quarters. He was finished packing and was saying good-bye to the laborers who were still with us. I watched and waited. Then Henry threw his sack over his shoulder and grasped the improvised handle of his old suitcase and started down the drive toward me. He stopped and put his suitcase down.
"Well now, Miss Lillian," he said, looking around. "It's a fine afternoon for a long walk, ain't it?"
"Henry," I sobbed. "I'm sorry. I couldn't change Papa's mind."
"I don't want you to fret none, Miss Lillian. Old Henry will be fine."
"I don't want you to leave, Henry," I moaned.
"Well now, Miss Lillian, I don't think I'm leaving. I don't think I could leave The Meadows behind. I carry it here," he said, pressing his hand over his heart, "and here," he said, pointing to his temple. "All my memories is of The Meadows, my times here. Most of the folks I knew are gone. Hopefully to a better world," he added. "Sometimes," he said, nod-ding, "it's harder to be the one who lingers.
"But," he said, smiling, "I'm glad I lingered long enough to see you grown. You're a fine young woman, Miss Lillian. You're gonna make some gentleman a fine wife and have your own plantation someday, or something just as big and proper."
"If I do, Henry, will you come live on my place?" I asked, wiping away my tears.
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- Page 53 (Reading here)
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