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"You donated sperm for my children, damn it!" she cried, tears streaking her face. "Do you know how twisted that is for me? You watched me marry him, you— God, did you want me back then too?"
He froze, eyes glittering with pain. "Yes."
The single syllable felt like a loaded bullet. Quinn’s heart lurched, and she nearly doubled over from the impact. “All that time,” she whispered brokenly, the truth sending a tremor through her chest. “All that time, you felt?—”
"From the minute I met you," he said, voice tight. "I never acted on it while he was alive. But yeah, I loved you. I still do. That tears me up inside, okay?"
She could hardly breathe. Images flashed through her mind. Brian’s controlling smile, Dagger’s unwavering support, the realization that she’d always compared the two. Had she really been drawn to Kade all along, even while wearing Brian’s ring?
She shook her head, tears sliding down her cheeks. "Oh, God," she whispered. "How can I even look at myself now? You must hate me for never seeing it."
"Hate you?" His laugh came out strangled. "Quinn, I’ve hated the way you keep yourself chained to a ghost. But I never hated you. I hated what Brian did to you, how he clipped your wings and then left you to crash."
Her tears came faster, blurring the sight of him. "He wasn’t all bad," she insisted, gripping the towel like her life dependedon it. "I loved him. I don’t want to erase him. I just…I don’t know how to move on without feeling like I’m betraying him."
Silence beat for a moment, heavy and suffocating. Then Dagger dragged a hand over his face, frustration etched into every line. "You can remember him without letting him dictate your future." His voice was softer but still pulsed with an undercurrent of anger and hurt. "You have a choice, Quinn. Either live in the past or live now."
She swallowed hard, heartbreak shredding her insides. "What if I can’t do either?"
He stared at her for a long moment. Then he blew out a breath, stepping back as if her words had finally winded him. "Then you’ll lose both."
Her lips parted in a silent sob, a wave of panic tightening her chest. She wanted to reach for him, to make him understand that she was terrified, not indifferent. But the words tangled in her throat.
Dagger’s eyes flicked to the door, muscles clenched so tight she thought he might snap. "This isn’t over," he said hoarsely. "But I can’t stand here waiting for you to decide you want me, not if it means burying yourself in guilt again tomorrow."
Trembling, Quinn managed a tiny nod. She couldn’t even form a coherent response. The weight of her choices, Brian’s memory, her own self-loathing, and this impossible love for the man who’d just shattered every lie she’d clung to, threatened to swallow her whole.
He stood there another heartbeat, gaze locked on her tear-stained face. Then, with a low, pained curse, he turned on his heel and stormed out. The door slammed behind him, rattling the walls.
The sudden silence pressed in like a vise. Quinn squeezed her eyes shut, tears streaming unchecked as she sagged against the counter. Her heart pounded so hard it hurt. The truth was out,raw and ugly. She’d loved a man who wasn’t right for her and ignored the one who might have been all along.
She sank to the floor, towel clutched around her shaking body. She could still feel the ghost of Dagger’s hands on her skin, the echo of his words reverberating in her mind.We both deserve to live.But in that moment, she wasn’t sure if she knew how.
Because admitting he was right meant walking away from the anger that had defined her and from the safety of a grief she now saw for what it was. Her final shield against a terrifying truth.
It was easier to blame Dagger than face herself. But now the shield was gone, left in pieces at her feet. Only the shattered remains of her guilt, her love, and her trembling hope remained.
Quinn finally rose, finally got dressed. After the heated clash with Dagger, she’d dragged on a loose shirt and cargo pants, put on socks and laced up her boots. She felt too exposed, even barefoot, too wound up to think beyond covering her damp skin. Every nerve still bristled from their argument, her body hummed with a mixture of fury, confusion, and a traitorous longing to run after him. Yet her mind screamed that she wasn’t ready to face him again. Not yet. Quinn still couldn’t calm the tremor in her hands. She sat cross-legged in the middle of the bed. It hadn’t worked. His touch lingered, the memory of his voice and the press of his body seared into her mind.
I thoughtif I let go of my anger, I’d betray Brian.That had been her mantra for so long. But it felt hollow now. Dagger had ripped open a deeper truth. She was using anger as a shield, because acknowledging her feelings for him, and the flaws in her marriage, was far more terrifying.
If I stop blaming Dagger, I have to admit I might’ve wanted him all along.
Her throat constricted, guilt and longing warring within her. She saw images of Brian on the day he slid a ring onto herfinger, his triumphant grin, how he used to tease her about being too serious. Then other memories intruded, instances where he dismissed her ideas, referred to her drawings as scribbles, or coaxed her away from opportunities in the name of “protecting” her.
Had she truly been blind to his faults? Or had she simply chosen not to see them because confronting them meant questioning her entire marriage?
A quiet sob escaped her. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, addressing Brian’s memory. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t the wife you thought I’d be. But maybe…you weren’t the husband I believed you were, either.”
The admission hurt, like ripping out a splinter that had been lodged under her skin for far too long. She bowed her head, her heart shredding, tears slipping down her cheeks.
Many moments later, when she could get past that monumental pain, she thought of Dagger. Thought about the look on his face, the way he refused to back down. That was him all the way. His only arguments with her husband had been about her, and now she saw it with such aching clarity. He was and always had been in her corner. More tears fell, but these were different because where her heart had been shredded, it was now mending. Because of him. Because he pushed her into facing something she’d refused, fueling her drinking to numb it all.
Moving on, choosing to live fully, didn’t have to erase Brian. Dagger was right. Brian didn’t own her present, especially from the grave. She could honor what they had while letting go of the anger that no longer served her. Because what that anger really did was hide the truth.She wanted Kade, that delicious self-sacrificing, stronger-than-steel man. She needed him.Facing that felt like the ultimate betrayal.
“Yet,” she whispered, picturing Dagger’s anguished expression, “I can’t keep punishing him. Or myself.”
Her chest clenched with another wave of tears. She thought of how Dagger looked earlier, fury and heartbreak etched into his face, telling her he was alive and so was she.We have a right to live.Those words echoed in her head, both condemnation and salvation.