Page 80

“No, it’s my decision and I have my own reasons for agreeing to this.”

Rylan reached for his hand and for the first time since they’d met, Cameron pulled his hand out of reach. He flinched at the flash of hurt reappearing on Rylan’s face, but there was determination there as well and Cameron knew he wouldn’t change his mind.

With reluctance, Cameron reached for Rylan’s hand and squeezed.

Rylan’s stiff posture relaxed, and he turned toward Thomas. “I agree to the plea deal.”

The lawyer gave Rylan details of what would happen once the defense accepted the plea, but Cameron tuned him out.

Cameron wondered if he knew Rylan as well as he thought he did. They’d always discussed huge decisions, well at least he thought he did. But then he remembered their trip to New York and Hawaii as a surprise. He proposed to Rylan and until that point, they’d never discussed marriage. And he’d run over Rylan’s opinions when he’d first asked him to move in. So Rylan’s decision on his own assault should be his own. He could be there for support, but Rylan was right, it was his decision alone.

It wasn’t until Rylan stood and shook Thomas’s hand that Cameron shook off his thoughts. Cameron offered his own hand before he turned to Rylan, giving him a small smile when Rylan reached for him and they wandered out the door. They were both silent as they headed down the elevator toward the parking structure.

Cameron knew it was dangerous that he’d driven them home without conscious thought, but by the time they parked and headed inside, he had shaken off most of his surprise at Rylan’s decision.

Rylan slipped his arms around his waist as soon as the front door shut behind them and placed his head on Cameron’s chest. The rest of his tension abated.

“Why were you so angry about the plea?”

“I… I don’t know. I was thinking he would get more time, but on the drive home I thought about a jury letting him out with no time served, and I knew it would be worse. And then I thought since it was a major decision, we would make it together. But that would be rather hypocritical of me, especially after realizing I’ve made many decisions under the mindset of surprising you, but I should have asked what you wanted each time, and I didn’t.”

Rylan shook his head, his hair brushing against his chin. “If I didn’t want all those experiences with you, I am strong enough to say no. But I love being with you, talking to you, and I wouldn’t change a moment.”

“I wouldn’t either. But from now on, I’ll ask you before any decision. I understand this was yours to make on your own and despite my initial reaction, I understand that now.”

“I took the plea for several reasons and maybe if you hear them, you’ll understand.”

Cameron nodded and Rylan stepped back, taking the time to remove his tie and suit jacket before he unbuttoned the top button of his white dress shirt. Cameron mirrored his movements before Rylan took his hand and moved them to the couch.

He sat with his back against the arm, Rylan moving his feet to Cameron’s lap. He reached for a foot before he massaged, pressing his thumbs in a circular motion around his heel and arch and watched as Rylan relaxed.

“Well, with this plea, he goes to jail right away and our friends don’t have to disrupt their lives to testify. He has to plead guilty to all the charges and they are on record, including the hate crime charge. But most of all, the sooner Tristan is our of our lives, the better.

“The maximum time he could get for the assault with extenuating circumstances and it being a first offense, isn’t very many years past the five offered. So this way, he’s guaranteed to serve the entire sentence of five years without a chance at parole.”

“But what after he has five years to think about getting revenge, he comes after you then?”

Rylan gave him a small smile.

“Soon after leaving the hospital, I asked Thomas to get you added to the restraining order since we’re married. And because of the plea, the permanent restraining order includes both of us for a lifetime. I did this to protect everyone in our lives and save all of us the aggravation and the possibility he could walk.

“Nothing is perfect. And if he’s stupid enough to come after us when he’s released from prison, well, we’ll deal with it. But I refuse to live in fear of him. I have had enough time doing that, I won’t let him influence me any longer.”

Panicking, he blurted, “What if he has a gun next time or sends someone to kill you?”

Rylan scrambled closer and straddled Cameron’s lap, cupping his face in his hands. He did that whenever he had a point to make and wanted Cameron to understand him. Before he could speak, Cameron released all of his worries with a rush of words.

“I’ve never felt fear until I spotted Tristan’s hands around your neck. I keep seeing his face when he threatened to kill you and the hatred mirrored in his eyes. His hatred for you.”

Rylan kissed him. It wasn’t sensual, but it brought tears to his eyes and he clutched Rylan to his chest, holding him close.

“I can’t lose you, Rylan. I can’t live without you.” Cameron’s voice broke on the last word.

“I’m not going anywhere, love. You won’t lose me, I promise. I know you weren’t listening, but Thomas explained the reason they were pushing the plea is that he will get mental health counseling. If he gets the help he needs, he’ll stay away from us. And the plea came within a week of him being arrested. The Tristan I know would never admit guilt, and now he’s willing to do five years. I’m sure he’ll never want to repeat the experience again.”

Cameron nodded. Yeah, the reality of his situation must have set in, because Cameron would have sworn he would make good on his threats.

“And trust me, love, I love you and our life together. I won’t put myself in danger.”