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Rafe narrows his eyes at me.

“So let’s just forget this happened. Okay?”

“Was someone following you?” he asks, his eyes flashing with determination, flecks of black glittering in the blue.

“No.” The truth? A lie? Who the fuck knows?

Rafe snarls, and his jaw tenses, and I know he can taste the borderline lie. “Why were you scared?”

“Where did you go?” I throw back.

“Fine,” Rafe growls.

I watch him and soften a little at his obvious frustration that I won’t allow him to help me. I walk to him and gently squeeze his arm. He flinches and pulls his arm free of my touch.

“Your brothers missed you,” I say softly before leaving him on the roof.

33

Summer

My heart is still slamming in my chest, remnants of fear still surging through me when I slide into my bedroom. Connor is still passed out in my bed, and while that brings about another wave of anxiety, it’s nothing compared to the spikes of adrenaline piercing me. I press my back to the door, squeezing my eyes closed as I grapple for control. In the quiet, Connor’s easy breaths become a guide, leading me into calmness. I inhale for five and exhale for ten, syncing my breathing with Connor’s.

The sweat on my skin lingers like slime, the essence of that predatory gaze still on me. I push away from the door and nearly run to the bathroom, shoving at my clothes, needing them off, needing to be under the water. I turn the shower on, adjusting it until steam billows around me. The scalding water pours over me, and I welcome the burn. I scrub at my skin until it’s pink and raw, but I can still feel it there, clinging like poison. The worst part is that it isn’t unfamiliar.

A hand glides along my lower back and wraps around my waist. My body goes rigid, but the scream lodges in my throatwhen the scent of clouds fills the shower. I relax a little and lean back into Connor.

“Holy shit, babe. It’s hot!” He reaches out and turns the temperature to a much less punishing one. He bends his head and kisses my shoulder, his voice still slightly hazed with sleep. “Morning.”

“Morning, big guy,” I reply, my voice shaking slightly.

“Did I scare you?”

I turn in his arms slowly, my confident mask fully in place again. “Did you enjoy your first andonlysleepover?”

“I loved spending time with my very affectionate pre-girlfriend most of all.” He cups my cheek, his eyes shining brightly with sincerity. “I didn’t mean to stay.”

I roll my eyes, trying to push some distance into the moment between us. “I woke up on top of you. It’s not like you had a whole lot of choice.”

He nuzzles my nose, and the distance I’d managed to put between us disappears. The icy walls I’ve put so much effort into melt in the presence of his warmth. He is able to do what the scalding water couldn’t manage.

“Just making sure. My pre-girlfriend’s boundaries are important to me.”

I reach up, twining my fingers into the golden hair at his neck. “I don’t remember agreeing to that label.”

“Soon, you’ll be begging to be my girlfriend. I’m just so damn charming,” Connor continues as if I hadn’t spoken.

I laugh and pull back. “Fine. Pre-girlfriend.”

I’m not sure why I agreed to it, but I realize I don’t want to deny his claim.

When Connor and I finally leave the shower, we dry off and go back into the bedroom. Connor collapses on the bed, leaning against the headboard to watch me dress. He’s always watching me.Sap.

“Do you want me to go home?” he asks, tucking a pillow behind his back, his abs rippling with the movement. “Am I smothering you?”

That’s another thing Connor does. He is constantly checking on where I am emotionally with him. I tilt my head and watch him, trying to process my emotions to answer him truthfully. Am I overwhelmed? Maybe. Am I uneasy that we actually slept in the same bed? Perhaps. I shake my head. “I’m not ready for regular sleepovers, but I don’t want you to go.”

Happiness radiates from him, his smile nearly blinding. Unable to resist the pull of his desire just to be with me, I walk to the bed and straddle him, kissing him deeply.