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He reached out, cupping my cheek in his large palm.I nuzzled into his warm touch.“From the moment you stepped into my office with your annoying questions, Hayes.I knew that I would tear apart anybody who tried to take you away from me.”

Chapter 7

STERLING

After the events of yesterday morning and bearing my soul to Ariel, my insides felt raw.Flayed open like a carcass and exposed.A lifetime of control, sawed apart in an instant and obliterated.

My nerves were frayed and every cell of my body punished me for finally embracing the truth.Maybe that was why I was here, in the elevator going up to Dean’s place.My brother and I had been sidestepping the past for years, but tonight, it was time to stop pretending.

The doors slid open with a ding, revealing Dean’s foyer.The place smelled like stale coffee, citrus cleaner, and the crisp ozone scent of whatever Frankenstein robot creation he was working on at the moment.But unlike the last time I was here, his living room was an explosion of pale cream colored lace.Vases of pastel floral arrangements covered the coffee table.The sight of the domestic chaos sent a pang of longing through my chest.My brother had found his mate and built a life free from the darkness of our family.

“Master Sterling,” said Jenkins’s dry robotic voice from the ceiling speakers.“Your visit is unexpected.Shall I inform Master Dean of your arrival?Or do you need a moment to admire the fabric samples?”

Leave it to Dean to program a snarky AI butler.“He’s in his office, as usual, I gather?”

“You are a genius as well as a soccer prodigy,” Jenkins replied.

I ignored his jab as I made my way to Dean’s office.My ears twitched as my enhanced hearing picked up the sound of a feminine voice humming in the direction of Dean’s bedroom.Nina, Dean’s mate.There was no time for social niceties.Tonight, I was here to see my brother.

The sound of clacking from his keyboard and his muffled curses came through the closed door even without shifter hearing.While I found healing on the field, Dean found his in computers and robots.Despite our differences, we were more alike than either of us wanted to admit.Still, the old anger bubbled in my chest.Yet another Nightfang wound.One that I was going to mend right now.

“We need to talk,” I said from the doorway.

Dean didn’t look up.“You look like shit.”

“Can I get your guest anything, Master Dean?”asked Jenkins.

“Alone.”I nodded in the direction of his balcony doors.

Dean let out a terse exhale, but followed me outside.Out here, with the noise of the traffic masking our words, we were safe to speak.

I gripped the metal railing between my hands, relishing the sting of the cold metal biting into my palms.The winds whipped around us, signaling the rain that was going to fall at any moment from the gray clouds overhead.

“You left,” I started, the words loaded with anger and hurt from somewhere deep.“You left me there with them.”Each word was raw.Words from a younger version of myself that had been betrayed by his older brother.Dean flinched at the accusations, but I forced them out anyway.

“You walked away.No warning.No explanation.Just one day you were there, the next, you were gone.Like I meant nothing.”

“I didn’t leave you, Sterling.I left them.There’s a difference.”He stared out at the skyline as he bit out each word.

I let out a bitter laugh.“Is there?Because from where I’m standing, you cut me out just the same.Like I was another part of the Nightfang problem.”

Dean finally met my gaze, his eyes flashing gold as the wolf clawed to the surface.“You think I wanted to leave?”His voice turned into a growl as he spoke.“Mother was using me against you.If I stayed, we would have turned on each other.She would have bled both of us dry.I thought that if I disappeared, she would go easier on you.”

“Bullshit.You were wrong.Years, Dean.I spent years thinking you saw me as dead weight.That I wasn’t worth fighting for.”

When Dean finally looked at me, something in his expression shattered..“Fuck, Sterling.”He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.“You were sixteen.You should’ve been worrying about your games and studying for finals, not whether your big brother was going to make it out alive after a pack meeting.”HIs voice broke.“I’m sorry I failed you.”

It was everything I had ever wanted to hear, and yet, there was no satisfaction.All these years, I’d nursed the anger and hurt in my heart, never once considering that Dean had been carrying his own pain.The first drops of rain fell on my face, like the heavens were opening up to wash away the years of misunderstanding between us.

“You should have told me.”There was no bite left in my voice, only the regret that we had wasted so many years.

Dean let out a bitter laugh.“And say what?Hey kid, Mom’s going to give you to the Songs as a chew toy if I refuse to bite when she orders?”He shook his head.“I know you, Sterling.You would have given her shit, and then she would have made you bleed for it.”

The truth of it stung.Dean wasn’t wrong.I had always been too hot-headed and reckless.Too stupid and full of hormones to know I couldn’t win a fight.

“So what now?We just pretend the last twenty years never happened?”

Dean reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a tattered piece of leather.I would have recognized the familiar scrap anywhere.The yellowed leather was from the ball we had kicked around until the stitching burst and the pieces fell apart.He tossed it at my chest, and I caught it in one deft motion.It was still warm between my fingers despite the steady rain falling on us.“We start over.”